Taxi Driver

Episode Report Card
Tippi Blevins: D+ | 20 USERS: B+
Hell Is Other People

They materialize in a sunny, but somewhat grainy-looking forest. "This is Hell?" Sam asks. "This is Purgatory," Ajay says. Sam's Adam's apple bobs around furiously for a moment while he tries to comprehend what he's just heard. "This isn't what I paid for. I booked the Hell tour." Ajay tells him to calm down. "This is Hell-adjacent," he says. "Follow the stream to were three trees meet as one. Where the trees, there are rocks; behind the rocks, a portal." It's a backdoor to Hell, he explains, and he's not going to take Sam all the way there because he likes to end at holding hands on the first date. Also, he's already taken too many risks in just bringing a Winchester this far. "I'll be back in 24 hours precisely. Be here." All right, obviously time works differently here because it was nighttime in the alley and daytime in P-Town. It's one thing when they ignore the show's history from four years ago about time's workings in Hell, but they can't even get it right within the same episode. As Sam turns to go, he takes the Sometimes Useful Demon Knife from his jacket pocket. "It's a good thing you brought that," Ajay says. "It's not an easy place." At first I laughed because, duh, it is Hell. Of course it's not easy! Then I watched the rest of the episode and realized Ajay totally oversold it.

Dean returns to the houseboat with food and finds the place seemingly deserted. When Dean calls out, Kevin peers out from behind a door, explaining, "I believed the closet would be safest." You are hiding from the King of Hell, not a hurricane! "He's in my head, Dean! If he's in my head, then he knows where I am!" Then what good is it to hide in the closet? Everyone is so stupid! "We should move out and find another place," Kevin says. Defying all logic yet again, nobody suggests taking the kid to the Lair O' Letters. Dean pooh-poohs his concerns and offers him some food, which draws Kevin out like a skittish stray dog. "Just tell me when it's all over," Kevin says. "Look, like I told you before, this isn't going to end," Dean says. He should probably just lie to Kevin at this point, because explaining the harsh reality of their lifestyle isn't exactly going to bring Kevin back from the brink of insanity. Kevin, having heard enough of the "buck up, kid" speech, grabs some food -- including all the pie, as Dean poutily notes -- and scampers back into the closet.

Back in the alleyway, Ajay the Rogue Reaper returns to his cab with a paper plate of pizza. Perhaps he acquired the taste for it from his former boss. As soon as he takes a bite of his meal, Crowley pops up in the back seat. "Hello, Ajay." Ajay reaches for the door, but Crowley locks it. Apparently going rogue and hanging around in a flesh-and-bone body strips you of some of your reaperly powers. Terrified, Ajay offers Crowley a slice of his pizza, but the King of Hell would rather talk about the cabbie's recent dealings with the Winchesters. "My operative saw you leaving with Sam Winchester yesterday," he says. "Sir, I was just doing what I do," Ajay says. Why call him "sir"? Aren't Reapers beyond the purview of both Heaven and Hell? They're like vultures -- and I don't mean that as an insult -- that clean up after death without any moral judgments. Anyway, he haltingly reminds Crowley that does occasionally freelance. This doesn't fly with Crowley, who eventually gets Ajay to confess that Sam wanted to get into Hell and that he's due back in 17 hours. Crowley stabs him through the back seat with a knife that doesn't seem to be the All-Purpose Angel Sword. The rogue Reaper glows about the mouth and eyes, then dies. It seems like it shouldn't be possible, but there you go.

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