Episode Report Card
Drunken Bee: B | 5 USERS: B-
The Hardy Boys: It's What's (Almost) For Dinner

In the barn, Lee approaches the cage, while Sam glances at some sort of metal piece-y thing-y. And I'd be more specific if they learned how to visually explain what anything in that damn barn is. Lee opens the cage door and shoots at Sam, but apparently is such a blue-ribbon hunter that he can't hit the large man trapped inside a small space. Cut back to the house, where Dean promises to kill them all if they hurt Sam. Tough talk from a guy strapped to a tiny chair. Dude, bust out of that shit! Back in the barn, Sam has somehow gotten out of the cage, and dispatches with Lee pretty quickly with a rifle butt to the head. He picks up the gun, but can't figure out how to work it and so tosses it aside. That is so cutely A-Team, to prevent him from being in a position to kill anyone!

Back in the house, Dadday's yelling for Lee. When he gets no answer he tells the other son, Judd, to come with him and then tells Missy to watch Dean. I have a feeling that Missy would have gotten the job in the barn done. See what misogyny does? It guarantees that your evil inbred plans will be foiled, is what. Dadday and Judd make their way into the barn with guns drawn. Sam is up in the hayloft. Dadday makes his way up the ladder, while Judd sort of vaguely keeps watch below. Officer Hottie creeps toward a little storage cabinet, and creaks its door hinges. Cut to Judd hearing the creaking, and then walking over and unloading his gun into the door. He opens the door but finds nothing just as Officer Hottie drops down from above him and puts him in a headlock. I just realized that these folks would have made for pretty good WWF characters. Like, they could have been called the People Eaters and they would wear necklaces strung with teeth and fake toes, and they'd be so crazy that Rowdy Roddy Piper would cower and gnash before their insanity, but before they came into the ring, there could be an Olympic-style "profile" of them, that shows them all living together in inbred bliss. Or maybe I just have hilarious sports profiles on my mind recently. Officer Hottie wrestles Judd to the ground as Dadday spots Sam and starts shooting at him. Judd then throws Officer Hottie to the ground and pulls his gun on her. Just then Sam comes running around the corner and yells, "Hey!" Judd, of course, swings toward Sam and shoots his gun off. Sam, of course, ducks, and the bullet goes right into Dadday's chest. Sam grabs the gun from Judd and rifle-butts him to the ground. Commercials. Sam finishes dragging both brothers into a cage and locking it. Officer Hottie has her fun trained on Dadday, who lies on the ground all shot and in pain. She tells Sam to "go ahead" out. Dadday takes this inopportune time, when he's bleeding to death, to puff about how he's really going to get Officer Hottie. She demands in a rage that he tell her why he killed her brother, and he wheezes, "Because it's fun," cackle, cackle, cackle. When will villains learn that it's usually the laughing about the horrid deed that makes good people snap? Officer Hottie is no exception, and so she shoots him dead.

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