Supernatural

Episode Report Card
Demian: A+ | 9 USERS: A
YOU GRADE IT
The Hardy Boys Are NOT Having SEX With Each Other! GOD!

...park the Impala somewhere unassuming. Just as he peels out of the Hollow Whorehouse's lot, however, the motel's neon sign shorts out, turning "TOREADOR" into "RED." DUN!

Somewhere unassuming, Dean parks and locks the Impala, then bow-leggedly ambles away just as...two teenage thugs arrive to violate Metallicar with crowbars! "DEATH!" howls Raoul, half-roaring and half-giggling at the unspeakable acts of depravity now unfolding on the television screen. "DEATH TO THOSE WHO WOULD HARM THE IMPALA! Hee! [Slurp!]" Um. Okay. Moving along, then. Dean, outraged as well he should be, starts back across the road to confront the heartless vandals when he's suddenly...run down by a soccer-mom minivan! "DEATH! Hee! Hee! Hee! DEATH TO HIM WHO WOULD HARM THE PLYMOUTH VOYAGER!" Raoul! "What?!" You're...you're being mean to Dean! In favor of a Plymouth Voyager, even! "Oh, shush! It's all in good fun! "Now please continue! I simply can't wait to see what happens next!" This is deeply unsettling. "[Slurp!]"

Back at The Whorehouse In The Hollow, Bugs Bunny tentatively -- trepidatiously, even -- knocks at Darling Sammy's door and, when The Ginormotron Antichrist answers, meekly asks, "You wanted to see me?" "Yeah," Sam nods and, after escorting his guest into the room and locking the door, demands to know if Chuck knows about the whole corpse-sucking sitch. Bugs does, and adds that he deliberately left the whole corpse-sucking sitch out of the books because he was afraid it would make Sam seem "unsympathetic." HA! "C'mon, Sam," Chuck continues over Sam's protests, "sucking blood? You gotta know that's wrong." They proceed to babble about Sam's state of mind this season, or whatever, but the opening part of the conversation's all that really matters. As the lovely and talented Cindy McLennan noted on the boards, "This was probably one of my favorite conversations of the hour (of the more serious moments, I mean). I love the idea of a writer sitting down with his character and telling him that he's doing stuff that makes him unsympathetic. And I loved Chuck's flat-out statement to Sam that he's got to know drinking blood is wrong. That the scene still managed to take a poke at the fandom is just icing." Indeed it is, Cindy McLennan. Indeed it is.

Meanwhile, back on the street, while the minivan accident wasn't that bad, Dean's still seeing stars. Like, literal stars -- the Canadian-accented soccer mom's sporting a pair of dangly, silver, star-patterned earrings, and they happen to be the first thing Dean's luxuriously lashed doe eyes focus upon once they've fluttered open. Hee. He then proceeds to scratch absently on the pink flower band-aids on his face, because the Canadian-accented soccer mom's daughter's "going through a doctor phase," and has liberally applied the pink flower band-aids to Dean's remarkably unharmed face. She actually managed to affix one to his hair. Ha! Dean groans himself to his feet, and of course finds the Impala's back window shattered, so he has little choice but to cover the hole with plastic tarp that starts flapping like the wings of a crow when he slides behind the wheel and motors off towards points yet to be revealed to the audience. Meanwhile, overhead, an actual crow caws. Nice!

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Supernatural

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