Episode Report Card
Demian: C- | 3 USERS: A
The Hardy Boys Just Have Their Party On TV

The next morning finds Crazy Sammy furiously shoving his gigantic darks into a duffel as Dean casually ambles from the bathroom, brushing his teeth and chuckling, which are not easy things to do simultaneously. Crazy Sammy's all, "I amuse you?" and Dean's all, "Mr. Big Bad Prison Guard, and Jimmy The Mook gives you the slip?" "Yeah, it's pretty funny," Dean smirks before wondering what, exactly, Crazy Sammy was doing out in the parking lot in the first place. "I was getting a Coke!" Crazy Sammy clenches. Dean pauses, then removes the toothbrush from his mouth. "Was it a refreshing Coke?" Hee. Crazy Sammy crazy bitchfaces, and the next thing we know, we've...

...rejoined Jimmy The Mook as he takes a very long Greyhound ride into a...

...FLASHBACK! Yep, we're back in Pontiac, where Jimmy's slicing up some peppers until the enormous antique multiband radio he's got parked on his kitchen counter starts emitting a solitary, piercing whine. Fortunately for Jimmy, he seems to have acclimated himself to this strange phenomenon over the last couple of days or weeks or months or whatever, so instead of collapsing into an epileptic seizure right there on the linoleum, he instead slowly stops chopping and crosses to lean in carefully towards the radio's speaker, where the whine gradually breaks apart into a series of mysterious susurrations, and before you know it...

...Jimmy's sunk his hand and forearm into a pot of boiling water! I won't even attempt to rouse Raoul at this point, for Jimmy is of course under Castiel's protection at the moment, and therefore the boiling water is not slowly turning his right arm into an aromatic and tantalizing stew, so what's the point? "ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ! What's the point indeed! ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!" Of course, Mrs. Jimmy doesn't know this, so when she arrives from the supermarket to find her bible-thumping overlord with his arm in the pot, she immediately drops the groceries and screams, "What the HELL are you doing?" and for that transgression, I'm certain she'll be spending the next seventeen hours in the prayer closet. Eve was weak, Mrs. Jimmy! Eve was WEAK!

Back in the present, Our Intrepid Heroes have boarded their intrepid Impala and are speeding off through the rain in pursuit of Jimmy's Greyhound until...Pete Campbell's secretary materializes in the back seat! Anna's unannounced arrival so throws Dashing El Deano that he nearly swerves Metallicar straight off the road, but he manages to pull everything together and snap, "You ever think of calling ahead?" at his new passenger. "I like the element of surprise," Anna shrugs by way of response, so Dashing El Deano leers at her. No, seriously. No. Seriously. They're in the middle of an apocalyptic crisis chasing after the escaped Vessel of the only angel who's ever been of any real use to them in the situation throughout the season, and after this one, here, nearly causes the destruction of Dashing El Deano's most dearly beloved earthly possession, Dashing El Deano leers at her. Shut up, Supernatural. GAH!

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