Rattle Rattle THEN! A long time ago, Our Intrepid Heroes found themselves stuck in a tiny Oregon town whose residents had been afflicted with a sulphur-based "dee-monic virus" Darling Sammy and Dashing El Deano called "Croatoan," for lack of familiarity with scientific naming conventions. An even longer time ago, Samuel Colt made a fucking plot device that could kill anything, except when it usually couldn't. Far more recently, Dashing El Deano and Darling Sammy learned they were meant to be angel condoms for St. Michael and Lucifer, respectively, and -- much to the horror of many in the viewing audience -- broke up with each other in the middle of a ridiculously scenic highway rest stop. Though, you know, not because they're meant to be angel condoms. I'm pretty sure.
Slashy, Slashy NOW! Somewhere in America, a premillennialist fundie stands on a dark, rain-streaked sidewalk, pestering innocent passersby with the question, "Is your soul Rapture-ready?" Guess he didn't get the memo that The Tribulation officially started four episodes ago when The Ginormotron Antichrist unwittingly unleashed Lucifer from Hell, thereby invalidating one of his cult's central doctrines. Ooops. While all this is going on, Dean wheels the Impala over to the curb and disembarks to enter the cheap-looking hotel that stands at the premillennialist fundie's back, and though Our Intrepid Hero takes great pains to carefully sidestep the religious nutball on the sidewalk, the premillennialist fundie nevertheless accosts him with, "Excuse me, friend, but have you taken time out to think about God's plan for you?" Dean tosses the loopy pamphleteer a hairy side-eye before grumbling, "Too friggin' much, pal." Having thus devoted more time than is strictly necessary to the insane crazy person on the sidewalk, Dean wearily enters the hotel. Fundie Man waits until Dean's vanished, then darts his eyes back and forth in a manner most suspicious. "Evil!" shrieks Raoul The Big Gay Supernatural Dragon, terribly agitated by this turn of events. "The exceptionally slender gentleman on the sidewalk is EVIL!" And Raoul, honey, the guy's a fundamentalist Christian shoving pamphlets into people's faces. Of course he's evil. "Eeep! I can't bear to look! Make that...that thing go away!" Um. He's already gone. "Really?!"