...arriving at Bobby's Emporium deep within the lush coastal rainforests of central South Dakota early the following morning. Cobwebs abound. Dean picks his way across the debris-strewn floors until his finds Bobby's upended wheelchair, and when he rights the thing, we can see bloodstained bullet holes have been drilled through the backrest at some point in the relatively recent past. Raoul would comment on this fascinating development, I'm sure, but as I believe I noted, he passed out from all the FUCKING AWESOME several scenes ago. "Lllaalalalalalallllaaaaah!" Dean kneels by the chair, references the very first Twilight Zone episode ever, then rises to pry off a piece of the decorative molding on Bobby's mantel. The hidden compartment he reveals by doing so contains Bobby's version of Sucky John's demonic day planner, and tucked away in the back is a black-and-white photo of Bobby and a casually attired Castiel posing in front of the heavily fortified gates of "Camp Chitaqua" with three other unidentifiable hunter-types. Dean recognizes the name of the place, and one quick into-the-photo cross-fade later, he's...

...scampering through the underbrush adjacent to the camp's locked front gate. Mere chains and padlocks are no match for Our Intrepid Hero, of course, especially after he spots...the tragic ruin of the once-magnificent Impala rusting on the other side of the fence! DUN! And before you even so much as have time to think about cursing The Kripkeeper for presenting Metallicar to us in so debased a condition, Dean's inside the gate, poking his face into his precious's interior and keening, "Baby, what did they do to you?" And then? WHAMMO! Yep, a sturdy-looking gentleman has sneaked up behind Dashing El Deano and sent him sprawling, unconscious, across the hatefully debased Impala's front seat with one blow to the head, and when the camera pans up to take in the new arrival's face? It's another Dean! Yahtzee! And as the METAL TEETH CHOMP! nibbles on New Dean's equally tantalizing Ducky Lips, we enter the episode's first commercial break wondering how bad 2014 can be, exactly, when it's got not one, but two versions of Jensen Ackles bow-leggedly stompy-clomping around.

Back from the break, Present Dean groggily comes to, only to discover his future self has handcuffed him to an iron ladder. "Kinky!" Oh, Raoul! So nice of you to join us again. I trust you've recovered from your earlier fit of AWESOME? "I have not! I'm feeling most woozy indeed!" Then you rest up there on your overstuffed armchair, and I'll carry on with the recap, though I fear the remainder of the episode's quite boring, comparatively speaking. "That's okay!" Really? "Really!" Good to know. In any event, Present Dean introduces himself to Future Dean, and explains the whole time-travelling sitch, making sure Future Dean understands it's all Zachariah's fault. And while we're on the topic of Zachariah, I should note that debate has erupted on the forum boards (go figure) regarding the exact nature of this little jaunt to 2014: Is it a real visit to the one and only future, is it a real visit to one of many possible futures, or is it Zachariah just fucking with Dean's mind again in order to bend Dean to his will? I myself am coming down firmly in favor of the third option, but I reserve the right to change my mind about it all when Kripke decides to tie up all of the season's loose ends within the last five minutes of the finale in May. Don't look at me like that -- you know that's what's going to happen. Anyway, where the hell was I? Oh, yes: Future Dean doesn't quite believe Present Dean's story, so he asks for confirmation like so: "If you're me, then tell me something only I would know." Present Dean doesn't even have to think about that one. "Rhonda Hurley. We were nineteen, she made us try on her panties. They were pink, and satiny, and you know what? We kinda liked it." "Touché," Future Dean eyebrows, and fangirls across the Internet are now furiously flooding LiveJournal with megabyte upon megabyte of hot tranny-on-tranny Double-Dean pornography. Thanks for nothing, Supernatural.