Rattle, Rattle WHAT THE HELL IS THIS? "GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORE!" shrieks Raoul The Big Gay Supernatural Dragon, jumping the gun considerably and now feeling quite the fool, given that he's writhing about upon his overstuffed armchair with delight over nothing more than a flock of twittering birds. "Oh, I am ashamed!" Raoul shrieks, blushing furiously. "However! In my defense, you did startle me with that most unusual outburst of yours!" My apologies, friend of friends, but I was quite startled myself, for they've skipped the BLOOD-RED THEN! this evening. "Entirely?!" Indeed. "How rude!" Well, to be honest with you, Raoul, skipping the THEN!'s nothing compared to everything else they skipped this evening, if you understand my meaning. "I do not!" Then follow along, my impressively fanged companion, and you shall learn all. "Thanks! I can't wait to see what this charming little Thursday-evening divertissement has in store for us tonight!" Oh, they're just going to break your poor little heart, aren't they? I'll get the Kleenex ready.

There. Now, where the hell was I? Oh, yeah: This THEN!-less introductory segment, during which the camera's risen on the interior of a darkened and absolutely tragic bachelor pad as a flock of incongruously joyful songbirds twitter somewhere outside the house. The camera hoists itself over the back of the sofa to take in the pad's apparent owner, dead to the world, clad in little more than some plaid boxer shorts and a stripey robe with his face all unshorn, and as I apparently attended college with this actor back in the day, it wouldn't surprise me in the least to learn this is not the first time I've actually seen the guy dead to the world, clad in little more than plaid boxer shorts and a stripey robe with his face all unshorn, but that's neither here nor there at the moment, for we must join this unconscious slob as he's...flung into a vision of this evening's events! Well, a few of this evening's events, actually, and some of them run in reverse so that the last shot in this guy's head is actually the first shot of the episode proper, so I do believe it's time for all of you to shut the hell up for the...

...Nonexistent NOW! The NOW! enjoys its week off, I'm sure, getting trashed at a bar somewhere with the THEN! and the -- spoiler! -- RAAAWWWR! as some geek sporting a Star Wars tee beneath his open Hawaiian shirt browses through the fantasy section of a comic book store somewhere, and the camera swings around the inordinately pleased expression on the geek's face before throwing its focus on the shop's front door, through which Our Intrepid Heroes enter at this very moment.