Supernatural

Episode Report Card
Demian: C | 1587 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Crying Won't Help The Hardy Boys

A little while later, Psychotic Sammy emerges from his epileptic fugue to find Dashing El Deano standing a the foot of the bed...or is he? Yep, the insane crazy person's actually just talking to himself again, but this time around, Psychotic Sammy's subconscious reached back into the recesses of his freakish Cro-Magnon skull to yank out a reasonable facsimile of his brother, and because this conversation isn't really happening, I'm going to skip ahead to rejoin...

...Bobby and Dean up in the parlor, where Bobby once more gives voice to his reservations regarding the entire situation, only this time around -- taking into account Psychotic Sammy's recent harrowing seizure, of course -- Bobby's convinced they're actually killing The Ginormotron Antichrist by keeping him locked up, and suggests they release him into the wild so he might frolic and suck on Princess Embolism's corpse arm once more. "I'm not giving him demon blood!" Dean quietly insists, almost weeping like the gigantic pussy he truly is. "And if he dies?" Bobby demands. "At least he dies human!" Dean shouts, and this debate isn't going anywhere good anytime soon, so let's hop back down to...

...Psycho Central, and oh, shit. The insane crazy person's still talking to himself, and long story short, Hallucinatory Dean's a complete and total asshole, and Psychotic Sammy's all "La-la-la-la-la-LA I'M NOT LISTENING TO YOU!" and Psychotic Sammy's subconscious gets very, very loud with the incessant insults and such until we...

...jump back upstairs, where Actual Dean vows, "I would die for him in a second," and you did that already, and in doing so you unleashed the goddamned Apocalypse, so shut UP, Dean, and let's head back down into...

...Psycho Central, where Psychotic Sammy's subconscious continues to insult its unusually large host organism until that unusually large host organism passes out again, and after a time-lapse cross-fade to later in the evening, we finally put an end to this tedious psychological dramarama when...the handcuffs chaining Psychotic Sammy to the cot mysteriously pop open, seemingly of their own accord! "Hooray!" cheers Raoul, for I believe he and I both know it's about goddamned time something actually happened in this hateful episode. "You are correct, kind sir! [Slurp!]" Psychotic Sammy, worried he's hallucinating yet again, quietly freaks while examining his freshly freed wrists, and it's then that the panic room's door magically pops open. DUN! "Hello?" Psychotic Sammy calls out, but he of course receives no answer. He warily rises to his feet, the only sound coming from that exhaust fan twirling slowly far above his head, and he tiptoes over to push on the door. He finds no one in the hallway, so Our Intrepid Psycho scampers over to the stairs to climb up to the main floor just as...My Deliriously Devious Baboo emerges from the basement shadows! Yay! Yep, sneaky Castiel actually freed The Utterly Insane Ginormotron Antichrist with a few flicks of his heavenly mojo and now, to cover his tracks, he deploys a little of the same to telekinetically shut and lock the panic room door. If I weren't so happy that someone finally -- finally -- stepped up to kick this episode's languishing ass into gear, I'm sure I'd question his no-doubt dubious angelic motives, but to hell with it. "To hell with it indeed!" Thanks for backing me up, friend of friends. "Don't mention it! [Slurp!]"

Supernatural

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