Now, where was I? Oh, yes: Dean and Bendy Lisa continue to chat away at each other like that, with Bendy Lisa making several excellent points while Dean verbally flounders about by way of response, and in the end, she breaks up with him. Again. Only this time she, like, rilly rilly means it! Or something like that.
Meanwhile, Secretly Evil Sammy's discovered something interesting up in Pathetic Patient Zero's bedroom: A sewing box stuffed with a variety of disgusting implements of the voodoo trade, including a vial of graveyard dirt and the skull of a black cat. "Sorry, Mittens," Secretly Evil Sammy smirks.
Out on the stairs, Secretly Evil Sammy runs into Depressed El Deano, the latter of whom immediately corners his brother to ask, "When that vamp attacked me, why did you just stand there?" Secretly Evil Sammy unleashes The Super-Special Puppy-Dog Eyes Of Pleading And Doom and LIES that he froze up in shock, or something, and by the time he was able to move again, it was already too late. And because even Dean is not immune to the power of The Super-Special Puppy-Dog Eyes Of Pleading And Doom, he believes every word out of Secretly Evil Sammy's secretly evil mouth. "He could just be stupid!" shrieks Raoul, and Raoul? "Yes?!" You must know that I secretly agree with you on that one, but if you want me to get to the abattoir at the end of this episode before we both die of old age, you'd best hold that forked tongue of yours for the next several minutes. "A whole big abattoir!? For me?! Really!?" Really. "I shall be as silent as the grave!" Oh, you can keep practicing. "Are you sure?!" I'm positive -- just stop interrupting me. "Okay! [Blaaaaat!]"
Back from the break I completely missed because I was too busy chatting with the imaginary lizard who lives with me on the Internet, we find Our Intrepid And/Or Secretly Evil Heroes back in This Week's Motel Room, where Secretly Evil Sammy's already figured out what's going on: Stupid Dead Cory killed her cat and stuffed its stripped skull into a sewing box with a variety of other disgusting implements of the voodoo trade in order to summon Veritas, the ancient goddess of truth, because Stupid Dead Cory wanted to know if her slutty boyfriend was fooling around behind her back. Unfortunately for everybody else in Calumet City, Veritas decided to stick around after sending Stupid Dead Cory to the latter's much-deserved early grave, so now whenever a person asks aloud for the truth, they unwittingly invoke the goddess, and we've seen how well that turns out for everyone involved. One additional detail of note is the fact that Veritas exacts a "tribute" from each of her victims, which likely explains the missing corpses, and which supposedly adds a bit of urgency to the matter at hand now that Dean's been infected as well. Fortunately, Veritas should be easy to find, given her penchant for "speaking truth to the masses." "She wants more than tribute," Secretly Evil Sammy explains. "She wants to be worshipped." "An attention whore," Dean realizes. "If you want to put it that way," Secretly Evil Sammy allows. "And what is the 21st-century version of 'speaking truth to the masses'?" Dean rhetorically wonders, for he already knows the answer to this one, for he's remembered that rather stiffly coiffed local investigative journalist from the bar's TV, and the next thing we know...