A Chapera Surprise

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: C+ | 1 USERS: A+
Enough With The Postponing...On With The Inevitable!

Speaking of back at camp, when they get there, Big Tom is doing one of his little dances that would be a lot funnier if they didn't all remind me of "Ding! Dong! The Witch Is Dead!" Because that really wasn't that funny.

And now, we enter one of the many segments in which Shii Ann attempts to sound smart. She says the tribe dynamics are "interesting," and that if anybody wants to take a power position, they'll need her as a swing vote. No, dear. There are six people, geddit? Rob/Amber/Rupert/Jenna certainly do not need you to "take a power position," as they are aiming for the final four, and they don't have much motivation to change that plan. Tom certainly does not need you, because if Tom just boots you and waits a week, then he may very well become a swing vote himself. You are not a "swing vote." You are cannon fodder. Think, "BOOM!," dear. And now we see that, in fact, Shii Ann has no plan, because her first move is to approach Big Tom and ask him to go to Rob and Amber about voting out Jenna. This is so dumb, because none of these people is going to see any advantage in voting out Jenna that they don't get from voting out Shii Ann. Why would Rob or Amber vote out someone who's proved herself to be an ally? Shii Ann's only shot here was to convince Tom, Rupert, and Jenna that the power pair of Rob and Amber had to be broken up. That was all she could do, and she didn't have the stones to do it. Targeting Jenna just reveals that, again, Shii Ann can't strategize, because she's crippled by her own pettiness. Just as last week, she didn't get together with Alicia or Jenna because she was busy gloating, she now wants to target Jenna, even though that's not going to work, just because Jenna is the person she doesn't like.

Anyway, Big Tom agrees that he'd rather vote for Jenna, but he points out that he doesn't have the ability to make that happen. He tells her that he's in the same position she is, and if she wants Jenna out, she can damn well pursue it herself. Big Tom certainly is the hero of the week, I think. Big Tom interviews that he does in fact want Jenna gone, because he thinks that there's a chance that Rob and Amber will team up with her and put him out of the game. Of course, because it's Big Tom, it comes out like, "Duuhruuuhorflafly."

Shii Ann's next move is to approach Rupert and tell him that Big Tom wants to vote Jenna out. "Yeah, he hates Jenna," Rupert says, missing the point as usual. Rupert goes on to say that he doesn't care who goes, as long as it's not him. Rupert says that if Shii Ann can get "them" (presumably Rob and Amber) to vote Jenna off, he'll go along. But, presumably, he's not going in for a three-on-three tie. And this is why, despite the fact that a two-person alliance seems small, the Rob-Amber alliance is in fact huge at this point. Because by the time you have six people, you need four votes to ensure that you vote somebody off. And if you have a two-person alliance you can't break into and you have a third person as your target, you can't do it. Which, again, is why Shii Ann's best shot was to choose Rob or Amber as her target, not Jenna. She's just not thinking. She thinks she is, but she isn't. She interviews that she's trying to get some kind of an alliance going, because "each one of them is planning to take a knife out and stab the other in the back." So what? They'd be better off with her? There are six people left. They're going to have to start stabbing each other pretty soon, and they all probably understand that.

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