A Slippery Little Sucker

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: C- | Grade It Now!
And So It Endzzzzzz...

At any rate, Todd gives his "I just have to hope they're with me" speech, which we've now heard from him a million times, and which just reaffirms that he isn't nearly the genius he thinks he is, because he spends entirely too much time sitting around like, "Oh, well, I just have to hope nobody from the majority I'm part of decides to change her mind." I've said a number of times over the last couple of years that as good as Hatch's game seemed at the time, you couldn't really play Hatch's game anymore, because all he really did was make an alliance and hope nobody would make any moves against it. Apparently, I was wrong, because aside from a couple of boneheaded "I am so strategic!" moves that didn't help him at all, that's really all Todd did. He made an alliance, his larger tribe had a majority at the merge, his tribe Pagonged the other tribe, and nobody who was in his tribe but not in his true alliance bothered to take any of the numerous opportunities available to change the game.

Amanda and Denise go off to take a walk, and Todd whines to Courtney in the shelter that "she's" probably trying to convince "her" to vote Todd off. No idea who is "she" and who is "her." Thanks, editing. Todd goes on to complain that Denise and Amanda are all "making peace" now. Courtney opines that Amanda's smart move is bringing Todd and Courtney, because Todd is "the schemer," and Courtney is "the tagalong." Todd says that he'd be "proud to lose to" Amanda, and not so much to Denise. Much as he earlier told Amanda he wouldn't be proud to lose to Courtney or Denise. Courtney agrees that losing to Denise would be no good: "This isn't, like, welfare. Like, she doesn't deserve it just 'cause, you know, she sucks at life." It's interesting, because as horrible of a thing as this is to say (you'll recall Adam made a similar remark about Jonathan "sucking at life" once), I think I kind of understand how it happened here. It certainly seems that Denise is not shy about lamenting how pitiful and meaningless her life is (in her own eyes), so I think Courtney isn't saying she's concluded that Denise sucks at life, as much as she's saying, "Denise saying that, boo hoo, she sucks at life is not a good reason for her to win." Which is very true. But whatever she means by it, Courtney looks down at Todd and sheepishly/proudly (it's always hard to say with Courtney) pronounces herself "the biggest bitch on the planet." The biggest bitch on the planet? Oh, please. Not even close. You wouldn't even be the biggest pin in the cushion.

Amanda and Denise talk. Amanda asks Denise whom she's voting for. Denise says she'd like to vote for Todd if she could. Amanda wants to explain her position to Denise: she and Todd have had an alliance from day one. She says she'd rather have Denise in F3, but it's problematic to "backstab" the person she's had the longest alliance with. Eh, nonsense. Denise asks Amanda if she'd be willing to consider having them both vote for Todd and forcing the tie. Amanda wants to think about it. And then, for almost the only time in this entire scene, we hear an entire line that involves no video of anyone's lips moving when Amanda says, "But I will guarantee you that I will not vote for you tonight." And then Denise nods and says, "Okay." This incredibly critical line, in which Amanda promises and swears the opposite of what she's going to do, is the one place where they happen to cut away from her mouth moving? And then they cut back for her saying, "But I cannot guarantee what they will vote." I'm just super-suspicious of this entire thing, given how Amanda seemed so certain later that she hadn't made a promise to Denise. Like, she knows she's on camera; why would she be, in post-show interviews, so confident that she hadn't done it? It makes me really suspicious that there was a line like, "But I guarantee you that I will not vote for you tonight without giving you a warning ahead of time." It just makes no sense to me that she would have this entire discussion with Denise where she's making it perfectly clear that she might very well be voting for Denise and doesn't know what she's doing yet, and then at the end, she'd say, "So anyway, I swear I'm not voting for you." It isn't sensible to me, and I'm left confused. Like, if she's telling Denise she's not voting for Denise, why isn't Denise acting more excited, since that would obviously mean Amanda was agreeing to vote for Todd? Why would Amanda essentially say, "I guarantee you that I will not vote for you, but I refuse to commit between voting Todd off [an obvious good move] and voting Courtney off [an obviously ludicrously bad move]"? What would be the point? It doesn't hold together, and the cuts make me suspicious.

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