Amazon Redux

Episode Report Card
Joanna: C- | Grade It Now!
Mostly-Seen-Before Footage

Peachy's voice-over adds that the female Jaburu tribe stumbled from the beginning, as we see a clip of Shawna unable to untie the tribe's boat. Meanwhile the men "brimmed with confidence," leading Davey Rockett to proclaim them "friggin' men of pride, men of honor, whatnot." Also, Rob missed his calling as a lumberjack.

At Jaburu, Christy "revealed her secret": despite her deafness, she's more normal, well-adjusted, and functional than anyone else in the Amazon. HeiDDi and Jenna looked smirky, because...well, Christy's deaf! The women put on a comedy show with their machetes and fire-building skills. Not that you could really call them "skills." Christy felt like an outsider because she couldn't read lips in the dark, but now that she's seen the episode, I'm sure she's glad she wasn't forced to endure the conversation in which Jenna and HeiDDi discussed the male tribe's reactions to their own cuteness. Christy could never be like them! 'Cause she's not! Always totally different! Always has been! I'm not entirely sure why that's a bad thing, but she cried and pulled her hair nevertheless.

By Day 2, Roger was annoying his Tambaqui tribemates. Not to mention the entire viewing audience. Rob did what he said, while Ryan and Daniel failed to impress by not willingly assuming the role of Roger's bitches. Roger called them "kids," and proclaimed them "useless," but as Peachy tells us, the tribe members still have it together, despite their differences. And despite living by the motto intended for seventh-graders on their prominently displayed banner.

Meanwhile at Jaburu, the women were busy boiling their underwear. Deena vocalized their difficulties with prioritizing, completing, and moving on from tasks, and then made a nasty face at someone's back. This was Deena before she went full-on psycho egomaniac and was only partly-on psycho egomaniac. She told us she didn't abide by the "I'm kinda feeling like I need to wash my buff now" thing, and was more interested in building a shelter. From which to rule the world, no doubt.

On Day 3, Janet hit "rock bottom." She didn't have far to fall. She told us she'd never before been so physically exhausted, and was having trouble even walking.

At the first immunity challenge, the burlap sack monkey-faced idol made its first appearance, and the obstacle course/race began. The men were off to an early start, but Ryan and Daniel "couldn't handle the balance beam." Or the game of Survivor, for that matter, as we find out shortly. So the women took over the lead and "HeiDDi led Jaburu to victory." As I recall, she just managed to cling to a zipline successfully, but as we learned in last week's episode, Peachy's not inclined to pass compliments her way, so maybe there was more to it than we saw. Shawna flopped across the finish line, and the members of Jaburu started shrieking and jumping around like a bunch of girls.

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