Crap from Africa
Tom says of Jessie, "What a woman!" Lex Loser thinks she's "hot!"
Kelly just says Kim Johnson's name, and Tom is flummoxed. Silas thinks about it, and then concludes that she must be clever. Ethan tells us Kimj is "honest, like [his] mom." He says, "I got along with her great."
We're now in Durango, Colorado. Kim "Thong Song" Johnson walks down the middle of a road with her family. She tells us there's nothing in her life more important than family. She says she has three kids -- she's proud that they're all married -- and three grandchildren, with another one on the way, and it doesn't get any better than that. Kimj tells us that her oldest child Wendy lives only four miles away with her family, and that her youngest son Teddy was married just two weeks after she returned from Africa. In a wedding picture, Kimj looks pretty and happy. Kimj's middle child Kerry just had "the most beautiful baby boy," and she spends as much time with him as she can. Kimj tells us that her childhood was difficult; raised by a single mother, she was more the mom than the child, and they had a lot of problems "health-wise, money-wise, every-wise." She says she never had a warm and loving relationship until she met her husband in college, and that he's been her best friend ever since. Kimj's husband Ted tells us that they got married when Kimj was nineteen; he thinks her childhood gave her the resolve to make their lives positive. Kimj plays tennis on an indoor court and then sits with Ted in the hot tub drinking wine and wearing a cowboy hat. She says she may look like a grandmother, but she doesn't act like one. She also may look like a weathered piece of luggage, but she doesn't act like one of those, either. Ted says there's no stopping Kimj once her mind is made up. She tells us that, at her age, her life is pretty set, and says, "I'm not gonna go out in the street and hang out with a guy full of tattoos" to find out what other people's lives are like. So it was "so cool" to spend time with different people. The thong clip plays as Kimj tells us, "I didn't go there with the idea of taking off my pants." Ted Jr. is in a room with a pool table (and is this a house, or Dave and Buster's?) as he tells us that they had friends over during that particular episode, and "all of a sudden the thong was out there" and the room went crazy. But not literally "crazy," which might have been the result if, say, Big Tom had stripped to a thong. Wendy's husband Dave jokes, "We've seen quite a bit of her. More than most son-in-laws get to see of their mother-in-laws [sic]." Wendy adds that the whole town and all of their friends have also seen a lot of her mother. Kimj tells us that she came away from the show with a "reaffirmation" of her own abilities. She says Survivor is the coolest thing she's ever done.