Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B | Grade It Now!
"I Quit. No, I Don't. Wait, What Was The Question?"

Aras pep-talks Shane that, soon, they will have food and water, and things will get better. Shane blows him off, forcing Aras to be all, "Come back, Shane!" and beg him some more not to quit. Aras tells Shane that if he sticks it out until he has food and water and still wants to quit, Aras will vote him off like he wants. But Aras wants Shane not to quit right at the moment. Ultimately, Shane agrees to hang in for one more round, as he intended to do all along.

Aras and Shane now take a stroll over to the shelter, where Aras announces in some manner that he actually thinks is diplomatic (it's sort of...unbelievable) that Shane has decided not to quit. "I'm really sorry about my, like, insanity flip-flop today," Shane says, as if that makes some part of this less horrible. It gets even worse when Aras "gently" says that they need to talk, all of them, as a group, about who's going to go home: "I just want to do this with honesty and, like, openness." He says that he wants the tribe to be physically strong, so, no hard feelings, he's going to vote off Cirie or Melinda: "And I haven't decided yet." And then, Aras continues to get worse. "See, I, you're looking at me like you hate me," he says to Cirie. Cirie: "No, I just, I don't know what you want me -- what do you want me -- I don't know what you to say about that." Because SERIOUSLY. And then Aras says the truly tip-top thing of all of this: "Can we come to anything over there?" Did you hear that, y'all? He wants someone to volunteer. He wants Cirie or Melinda to agree to leave. Not because she's not an asset, not because she's not a good player, but just so that Aras doesn't have to decide whom to vote for.

Do you see what bullshit this is? You can screw people over, but you cannot ask them to comfort you about it. Aras wants them to give him cover by voting themselves off. It's the most twisted, messed-up version of what it means to be a nice person. It's like working for a company that treats you like crap and then acts like you owe it to them to resign. Fuck that noise. You're not obligated to make it easier for people who treat you like dirt, and that's what Aras is doing here. I just do not understand this entire outlook, and it infuriates me utterly. At least own what you do, you know?

Anyway, Courtney starts grumbling that she doesn't appreciate having Aras come over and dump this on everyone without any warning. Aras thinks he's being diplomatic, but of course, it's not like he consulted his supposed "alliance" first. The irony is that Aras undoubtedly sees Sensitive New-Age Guy all over himself, but he's being, among other things, totally sexist. If Courtney and Danielle were men, he'd have consulted them rather than telling them what was going to happen in front of Cirie and Melinda. I guarantee you -- guarantee you -- that that's true. I've known this guy a million times, and this is part of the game. He finds women wonderfully peaceful and soft, you know? He just loves guiding their souls. Also: cries in bed. Just a guess. Anyway, Courtney also interviews that announcing their alliance to everyone was pretty fucking idiotic anyway. As if I need anyone else to hate even more, Shane now announces to Cirie and Melinda, "There's been an arrangement, obviously, made. What [Aras] said sounded insincere, I don't know what to tell you. Like, I don't care which one of you goes. I just don't, like...whoever doesn't go now is going next." It's not like all alliances don't work this way -- that you think you know who's next after the person you're booting -- but to serve this up to people and ask them to eat it in public is so fucking presumptuous, and it is just another form of "keeping it real" by being as aggressively inconsiderate to other people as possible and then insisting that all you're doing is telling the truth. It's also the completely unnecessary making of enemies, which can only hurt you later. There's no reason to be like this with people, except to show off. "If this total instability continues," Courtney interviews, "it's going to be very hard to know that [Shane] will be there for us." Wow, they doubt Shane? Well, what can be counted on, then?

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