MONDO EXTRAS

Every time I see the commercials for Don't Say a Word, I'm convinced that the Brittany Murphy part was written for Calista Flockhart -- vulnerable, underfed, and writhing around. Calista's version of writhing is more commonly known as dancing.

We're back, and Peachy's on the set, which I just noticed features a zebra rug. I wonder whether the camps will be decorated likewise. PETA will be so pleased. And yes, the zebra is an endangered species. And yes, I realize that may be a faux zebra rug, but still it's lame. Peachy tells us that the game is the same in any location, which is why I'm still campaigning for a parking lot in east Baltimore. In a montage of clips, it looks like the Survivors are asked to respond to names with one-word descriptions. Sean says, "Loudmouth: Sue." This is followed by a clip from Pulau Tiga of Sue telling Sean to "get some balls." Gervase says, "Grouch: B.B." Rudy says, "Grouch: probably me." Rodger and Alicia both think Jeff is the grouch. A typically clueless Jerri says she has no idea who might be grouchy. Mike and Tina call Jeff a troublemaker. Jeff calls himself a troublemaker. Sue says "femme fatale," but it sounds more like "faaaaah fahhhtale." I have to rewind it about six times before I can figure out that's what she is saying. She then says, "What the hell is that?" Gervase and Jeff think Jerri is a femme fatale. I think that's a compliment -- "femme fatale," to me, implies some sort of intellect, wit, and basic magnetism. Sue calls Richard a whiner. Gervase and Kimmi call Debb a whiner. Rodger and Jerri think Colby is a backstabber; Alicia thinks that attribute more accurately describes Tina. B.B. thinks Gervase is the backstabber; Mike thinks it's Jeff Varner. All of the Tagis -- Sean, Rudy, and Sue -- think of Kelly when they hear the word "backstabber." This is juxtaposed with Kelly saying that "everyone" is a backstabber, which is juxtaposed with a shot of all the Survivors standing around looking shifty. Hee. I'm realizing, as I recap this, that it doesn't translate so well on paper. And it wasn't that great on viewing to begin with.