Crocs, Cowboys And City Slickers

Episode Report Card
admin: B- | Grade It Now!
Go, Go, Golden Boy

Elsewhere, still working his angles, Gary has a chat with Danni -- and don't we all kind of wonder what that dynamic is like? -- and he tells her that he can't not vote for Blake, feeling the way he does. It turns out Amy is here, too, as she and Gary try to tell Danni that there's no alliance among the three former Yaxha members. And also, Amy is not secretly Mike Piazza and Brian is not secretly Randy Moss. Anyway, I think the subtext here is that if they'll get rid of Blake this week, Amy and Gary aren't necessarily going to fight for Brian in another week. Gary falls back on the always unappealing "I want good people to go forward" argument, saying that he wants Blake to leave next. Danni describes this conversation in an interview, saying that she told Gary she felt the same, but needed to talk to the rest of her crowd. She heads for Farmer Beavis, telling him that she and the Yaxha members sort of think that Blake should go for the sake of "team unity," by which she means, "It will be a lot more fun with fewer stories in which the denouement takes place at a kegger." Farmer Beavis isn't hearing any of it. He's voting for either Amy or Brian.

And then there is one more shot of Blake telling a long, boring story in which he is awesome. Danni interviews that she likes Blake, but that the group is fed up, indeed. She calls his routine "typical frat-boy stuff." Insulting to frat boys! (Sound of choir singing.) We cut back to Blake being all yuk-yuk about the girl he "almost" lost his virginity to, which...all righty. I'd be tempted to be like, "Oh...failed attempt? Lost the...will, at the last minute? Thought you'd lost your virginity and only later found out...not so much?" Danni allows that Blake is great in challenges, and that she has the problem of Farmer Beavis and Bobby Jon both having refused to vote for Blake, so she's the one in the position to decide whether to swing or not. She calls it "part of the game [she] just [doesn't] like." The...the voting part? The strategizing part? Is it the not-eating-or-drinking part that you enjoy more? The smelling-like-weeks- of-Guatemalan-dirt part? What a weird comment. Anyway, Danni goes on about hurting people's feelings and so forth, and...ugh.

Tribal council. They all come in and are seated, and if you don't know enough to know Brian is going to be voted out, then you know nothing about how they edit this show. They've done these fake-outs a zillion times, where they try to make you think that the inevitable isn't, and at this point, it's boring, because it's always inevitable. Anyway. Jeff starts off by asking about last night's storm. Gary says it was "character-building." He makes a comment about the two guys who slept through it. Brian comments that at least he woke up eventually to take a "late shift." Watching the fire, maybe? Could the fire have still been going? Or just a late shift under the umbrella? Anyway, Gary claps him on the shoulder and says, "Yeah," so that it will appear as though Brian isn't in trouble. Blake, on the other hand, is reduced to basically saying he didn't really realize what was going on. Man, that boy's teeth are really, really white. Who needs a reading lamp? Amy sings, "Gol-den Booooy!" Jeff asks about this, and Amy repeats her "comes up roses" explanation. She also mentions "a spahkle in his tooth," which is spot-on. Jeff asks Blake about the fact that he was literally gasping just a few weeks ago, and now he's Golden Boy. Blake says that he crashed, but now he's well.

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