Cut Throat

Episode Report Card
Kim: C+ | Grade It Now!
Double Trouble

Jim goes on to flatter Upolu by saying that he's gotten to know them and he knows that not one of them would do something so dishonorable against their tribe. Brandon says that it's interesting that Jim feels that way now, since Upolu was made fun of at the last Tribal for playing with integrity (they were?) and Brandon proclaims that the "smaller people" (that's definitely Brandon, who is wee!) won't be bullied anymore. Brandon affirms that Upolu stands with Cochran, period. Ozzy interrupts and asks what he ever did to make Cochran feel small, since he doesn't think he did. Cochran says that Ozzy made him feel small by trying to vote him out in the first few weeks because he thought Cochran was weak. Ozzy is just like, "..." because Cochran's got him there. Ozzy did do that.

Probst points out that Jim has immunity, so he's powerful. Jim says he thought about giving his necklace to Ozzy and Probst is like, "Why would you do that?" Since his previous speech didn't work on Brandon, Jim tilts this one Coach's way by talking about how Jim is a warrior and has a warrior spirit and there are eleven people there who play like warriors and warrior warrior warrior, plus let's vote out Cochran, who is not a warrior AT ALL and he told me he hates warriors and warriors come out and play. Jim gets all fired up and urges them to send a message to anyone who will ever play the game that you can play with honor and that turncoats can't win and snitches get stitches. Probst asks Coach if voting Cochran out would change the game and Coach says that it would send the message that sticking up for yourself is bad. Oh, Jim. Your speeches are not landing, dude. Give up. Jim tries again and says that losing Cochran wouldn't change the numbers advantage that Upolu enjoys, but it would send a message about loyalty.

So then Ozzy tries some strategy that I don't really understand. He says that if he goes to Redemption Island, he will get to eat all the fish he catches himself, and he won't be stressed out by strategizing, and he'll rest up and get stronger. And also, at some point, Upolu is going to be the only ones left and they'll have to cannibalize themselves and "it's going to get a little funky." Ozzy, make a point. You're just stating facts. Is he trying to say that he'll return when they are at their weakest? Is he saying that killing him will only make him stronger? Is he saying that they have nothing to fear but fear itself? I think he actually has a strong point in there, which is that the members of Upolu need to start thinking for themselves and thinking of their endgame. The problem is that each of them would rather take Cochran to the finals than Ozzy. Cochran has zero case to make for winning the million dollars. He was not good at challenges. He wasn't good around camp. He didn't provide. He didn't boost morale. He turned on his own tribe to save his own ass. Unless he has some miraculous second half of the game, he's got nothing. So he's the perfect person to take to the finals, because you can say, "Maybe I didn't do much, but I definitely did more than Cochran!" You wouldn't have that advantage with Ozzy. In conclusion, shut up, Ozzy. So Ozzy says that his message is that he will be back, and he will see them all as they come through Redemption before he defeats them and sends them home. I guess Ozzy read the room and realized that Jim's strategy wasn't working. And Jim decides to keep his necklace, as we all knew he would, because what a dummy.

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