In the first heat, Clay and Ken are paired against Jake and Jan. Now, there's a fair race. If the finish line is natural death. Seriously, how do Jake and Jan keep ending up paired together? Peachy advises them to "switch out [their] buffs." Standing next to stately Ken, Clay is looking particularly gnomish in his teensy tennis shorts. They're off, and Jan manages the ladder fairly well. Actually, considering all the busting I do on her, she performs reasonably well in the physical challenges. Still, Clay and Ken are ahead, causing Peachy to dramatically announce, "Clay has released his ball," which cracked me up. The whole fishnet thing is stupid and demonstrates no skills whatsoever. As the race continues, Peachy insists that Jan and Jake are "right behind," but really they're not. As Clay and Ken approach the cargo net, Peachy warns, "Don't lose that ball!" Jan and Jake somersault down the cargo net in surprising symmetry, but their tandem acrobatics aren't enough to secure them the win, as Clay and Ken are proclaimed the victors.
Next up, Ted and Penny take on Brian and Helen. They're even up the ladder, and then the log-hacking begins. Ted -- who Peachy accurately describes as swinging "like a madman" -- is doing so in the most literal sense. There's no method to the chopping as he flails about while the other members of the tribe slowly back away. It's no surprise when the more methodical Brian finishes first, since it's unlikely that Ted's hatchet made contact with the log in the same spot twice. From this point on, Helen and Brian zip through the fishnet, and take it through to the end.
In the finals, the two winning pairs take on each other. Although Clay and Ken "make quick work" of the ladder climbing and log chopping, they're no match for Helen, who is an ace at "workin' that fishnet." Which results in a much better visual than Helen "workin' those fishnet[s]." Suddenly Helen and Brian are finished, with Clay and Ken nowhere in sight.