Eruptions Of A Volcanic Magnitude!

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B | Grade It Now!
Chris Makes His Move

Previously on Judging Ami: Leann was gone, and boy, was Ami mad. Twila was getting a little mad, too, but more in the "dog" sense than in the "anger" sense. Jeff came zooming up in the reward car, and after besting Ami in a balance-and-swim competition, Eliza zoomed off with it, taking Ami and Chris with her for a night away from home. Ami and her fuzzy bathrobe tried to work on Eliza for a vote, and she tried to convince Chris that splitting Scout and Twila would be smart, but Chris just rolled his eyes and ate his dinner, while Eliza fretted with guilt over the prospect of voting against Ami -- who had already, of course, voted against her. Chris put all his eggs in the basket of Eliza's mental fortitude, and shivered in fear. The immunity challenge was tabletop shuffleboard, kind of (oh, just go with it), and Chris proved that when push comes to shove, he has the touch. He tried on the immunity necklace and found it a nice fit. Eliza toyed with the idea of amusing herself by voting off Scout instead of Ami, but in the end, she decided she'd rather have a million dollars than one good belly laugh, and she stuck with her alliance. At tribal council, Ami ripped into Twila about having sworn loyalty on her son, and Twila spit out a hearty "screw you" in return, proving that the old wives' tale about not coming between a mama bear and her cubs was written by some fairly smart old wives. Interestingly, the previouslys are edited to suggest that Eliza wept with pain as her vote was read and as Ami left, which is...not really what happened. Anyway, five remain, and as the math majors among you will surely agree, there are only four spots in the final four. Somebody's not making it to the final round of heavy hype. Who will it be?

Credits. I have to say, looking at the credits and remembering everyone's positions early in the game really does make me admire Eliza. She's never had anything but grudging allies, she's had to reposition herself a couple of times to stay in, she's known when to cooperate and when not to, and she's put on some nice challenge performances late in the game. I think she was definitely underestimated early on, at least by me. Also, her swimsuit has faded and deteriorated far less than some others of this and previous years. I'm looking at you and your floral ass, Amber.

Volcano! The full moon lights up the water. As the little group returns from tribal council, Chris comments on what a nice night it is, and Scout agrees. And it is a beautiful night, except for all the hating. Chris comments that, as they came back to camp, it seemed like the night would be fairly uneventful. But as he notes, "there was still a lot of emotion stirring in Twila." Among other things, Twila is not loving the fact that Eliza jumped on the "Twila sucks for swearing on her kid" thing with Ami at tribal council. Which, interestingly, I thought Eliza did only in the sense that she sympathized with Ami for feeling backstabbed, not so much because she thought Twila was evil for doing it. And around the campfire, Eliza tosses off a "Sorry, T" that's really difficult to evaluate without context, but certainly doesn't sound like much of an apology -- not that one is necessarily required, but just for the purposes of clarity, it doesn't exactly sound like Eliza was trying to make express her great regret for participating in that. Twila says again that she feels really bad about the swearing on her kid, and that Eliza knows she does, so she's not sure why Eliza needs to "keep rubbing salt in the wound." Twila goes on to say, in increasingly aggressive tones, that the only person she feels like she needs to apologize to is her son, so she's not dealing with it with the rest of them anymore. She says again that she's sorry she ever did it, but adds that she's also tired of hearing about it from them. She also makes use of the word "condole," which is a real word meaning "grieve" (thanks, online dictionary!), but which I think she's using to mean something like "reconcile." In other words, I think she just accidentally used a real word when her intention was to invent one spontaneously through malapropism. Anyway, after the discussion of the limited need for condoling, Twila says, "The rest of you motherfuckers can kiss my fuckin' ass." (Or something. The bleeping was honestly so aggressive in that clip that she could have said "The rest of you mother-loving chicken-pluckers can kiss my kidney stones," and it would be hard to tell the difference.)

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