Exile Island

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B | 1 USERS: A
Quitting Time

The two tribes are Steph, Ian, Katie and Jen, versus Tom, Gregg, Janu, and Caryn. Ready? Go! I have to say that of all the really tedious challenges I have ever recapped, this is the most tedious. There's just very, very little I can tell you, with the exception of a few things. Janu and Caryn initially do nothing, while the entire other group gets to work. After Probst makes a couple of hinting remarks, Janu finally starts participating, and ultimately does well. Katie becomes the drag on her team, because she's just...really not fast. Ian and Steph are very frustrated with their team, but they can't move as quickly as the Tom-and-Gregg-driven other group. So it goes on and on and on and ON and on, but very little happens, and ultimately, Tom, Gregg, Caryn, and Janu win reward. Man, that damn thing took forever. And for someone who hasn't apparently had the energy for two weeks to do anything around camp except lie in a hammock, Janu certainly did pour it on during the challenge that stood to net her a reward. That's the kind of thing that will not make you any friends on your tribe.

Later, the winners make their way to their feast. They are welcomed by a group of locals, as Tom explains how great it was "to meet the people," and to respect them and be respected by them. "It's just another gift that I bring home," he says. Caryn agrees that being blessed by a real chief and given a floral headpiece was pretty damn cool. You know, I would take a floral headpiece right about now. They enjoy some dancing entertainment as Gregg praises this look at "what is life in Palau really like." ["When tourists are around, yes." -- Wing Chun] Dancing follows. Once that's over with (thank goodness, because culture, yuck!), they adjourn to a little building where the feast is to be held. Janu explains that they sat down and were confronted with "epicurean delights." It's good to know that the energy that she hasn't been putting into digestion, Janu is now devoting to vocabulary development. Caryn eats at the little table as she voices over that there wasn't any strategy talk -- everyone just tried to enjoy the food. But very quickly, of course, it turns into a drama about the Endless Suffering of Janu, who tells us, "I'm going to make myself sick." She excuses herself from the table, explaining, "I thought I was going to have an embolism." Excuse me, an embolism? Awfully dramatic for a case of indigestion. I'm not sure I've ever read the instruction, "In case of embolism, induce vomiting." Caryn asks rather disbelievingly whether Janu is throwing up all this food, and Gregg confirms that she is. Gregg interviews that it was too bad to waste part of a feast like this on somebody who couldn't actually enjoy it. Then, just because we love the people in the cheap seats, Janu gives a very impressive, rattling belch, and we are done.

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