Survivor
Fiji Reunion

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Miss Alli: C | Grade It Now!
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Earl Redux

Up next: Gary talks about practically dying. And who gained weight for the show? But first: A suffering montage!

We come back, and Jeff is talking about the physical and mental toll taken by the game, and of course, we can go to Gary, a/k/a "Papa Smurf," who had to be medically evacuated. Jeff confirms what we heard, which is that the actual reason for his illness was "thousands of fire-ant bites." Yoiks. That doesn't sound very good. I actually get text messages about this show sometimes that say things like, "I wish that guy would get thousands of fire-ant bites," but those text messages (1) generally are in jest; and (2) mostly involve Mookie. Gary says that he was only physically changed in one way, and then he shows off a truly huge tattoo on his arm of the Survivor logo. Wow, really? That kind of freaks me out. You want to be a ninety-year-old guy whose arm says, "Outwit, Outplay, Outlast"? In really, really, really big letters?

Mookie. Jeff points out that Mookie never got to be in the nice camp, ever. He fails to mention that this was probably the universe's revenge. Plus, he gave away the immunity idol for no reason. Jeff asks what the worst part was, and Mookie says that going to almost every tribal council was pretty lousy, constantly wondering if he was going to be sent home. And then he name-checks "Dreamz" again for getting him voted off. I think maybe he and Edgardo could get a group rate on therapy.

We now move into the rapid-fire segment in which Jeff tries to get to everyone, mostly so you can see how all the women did their hair, which is one of the few things that is consistently worth discussing about the reunion show.

Jeff asks Stacy about the part where everyone said they hated her guts. Stacy says that it "changed [her] perspective on [her]self and other people." She doesn't really say how, and Jeff doesn't ask. Nice job, Jeff. Incisive interviewing technique, there.

Liliana. ("Who the hell is Liliana?") Jeff says he heard she gained twenty pounds to come on the show. Basically, she immediately admits that she didn't, but she maybe ate a little more before she came on. Yeah, way to break Jeff's stride, Liliana. No wonder no one remembers you! She says she intended to win, so obviously, she intended to be there a little longer.

Rita, are your kids proud? They are proud. Hey, there are Rita's kids in the audience. With Uncle Nick! And she says that she never gave up.

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Survivor

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