Flirting And Frustration

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B- | Grade It Now!
My Alliance-Mate Flicka

Aitu, Day 7. Cecilia takes on the task of showing everyone around the beach. Jonathan is really impressed with the quality of their shelter, among other things, and Cao Boi can't say enough in his interview about how welcoming Cecilia and Ozzy are. He says that because they're Hispanic, they were all "mi casa es su casa." Of course, that appears to be pretty much Cecilia only, which would suggest it may be because she's hospitable, rather than because she's Hispanic. I don't see Ozzy being all that hospitable, unless he's showing you where in your back the knife will go. JessiFlicka is all excited about the "change of energy" on the tribe. She says that she can "feel the vibration from other people." You know how it is when you feel vibration from other people.

Cao Boi and JessiFlicka have a very intense conversation in which he looks at her and declares, "You're not Asian...but I love you." Oh, Lordy. She giggles. They hug. She says she's glad to have "fun people to hang out with." The tattoos always find each other. Especially when they're barely wearing any clothes.

So now, Cecilia wants to get down to business. She tells Candice the story of the last tribal council: "Billy, when he left, said that you guys had, like, love at first sight." At first, Candice isn't entirely sure what Cecilia is saying. "Love at first sight?" she asks. "You and Billy?" Becky asks in disbelief. Candice laughs and grins uncomfortably, more out of confusion than anything. "What did he mean by that?" she wonders. Cao Boi teases her about blushing. Cecilia tells Candice what Billy said about them mouthing "I love you," and at first, Candice talks about having told Billy she felt bad for him, and it almost sounds like she's going to deny having said anything like that. But she does cop to the "we love you," which he apparently misunderstood. Just slightly. Candice does okay here looking chagrined at the confusion and sort of embarrassed, but not disgusted or "Are you kidding? Ptui!" about it. Jonathan grins, finding all of this terribly funny, because this is just like when Téa Leoni thought he was in love with her. (See?) When Cecilia hits them with the part about Billy saying that meeting Candice was his big prize, Jonathan's jaw literally drops and dangles. "You led him on, Candice!" Jonathan teases. "No, I didn't!" she protests. "You...led...him...on," he continues. "Oh, please," she says, finally giving up.

Over at Raro, the Four Buff Multicultural Dudes are standing around. This is Brad, J.P., Adam, and Nate. Parvati comments that she plans to flirt with all the guys and be all awesome and stuff: "It's what I do best." Remember how I said last week that Cecilia was pretty in something other than that hollow-faced, huge-dead-eyed, bony way that the show usually favors? Parvati is the epitome of that. They just love the women who look like Jenna Morasca, with no meat and the huge bug eyes and the obvious void where a soul should be. It's not that it's bad, it's just that the producers' ability to find one who looks like this in practically every season is absolutely weird. We watch as Parvati makes "baby monkey" remarks (ick) to Adam. She tells us that she had Adam "from the beginning," so now she's going to work on Nate. She chooses to start by telling him that his pants are falling down. Is that her opener? Good Lord. "What's your name, Parvati?" he says. "Parvati, you are on top of it." Yeah, I think he's right in the palm of your hand, whatever your name is. She giggles about pulling Nate into her web, and...I am very confused. Just very, very confused. It's like I ache on behalf of women, but also on behalf of people who can read.

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