Go Out With a Bang

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Joe R: B | Grade It Now!
Mocking Jay

After the break, everybody's back at camp and Kim and Chelsea are discussing how the boys must know deep down that they're in trouble. Kim interviews with confidence how her plan is to play the soft-spoken girl who doesn't seem to have much power (and thus doesn't need to be a priority at Tribal), but then in front of the jury and convince them that she was the person making all these moves. It's a tougher prospect than I think she realizes. Meanwhile, Chelsea is expressing some queasiness at having to actively lie to Jay and Troyzan knowing they're the next to go. She wants to somehow "not know about it," whatever that means. It's making her look totally wishy-washy and weak. (Also? I don't know if it's because of last week's confrontation with Tarzan the Passive-Aggressive Plastic Surgeon or maybe because of how she's framed, but Chelsea's enhanced boobs are basically ALL I can see when they cut to her.) She interviews that she has looked both Troy and Jay in the eyes and said "You can trust me 100%." And, look, I can sympathize with the difficulty of looking into Jay's eyes and saying anything but the deepest truth in your soul. But considering the whole point of the game is to lie to people and make them trust you and them eliminate them, it's hard for me to sympathize. Particularly since Chelsea isn't even saying they should NOT get rid of Troy or Jay. When Kim points out that either one of them could go on an immunity run clear through to the final, Chelsea doesn't disagree. Alicia, having been forged on a trash barge and animated to life as a scourge upon the people, like a Golem in poorly-fitting swimwear, interviews that Chelsea pissed her off by having feelings. "Nobody told you to mix with the boys anyways. Like, we were fine without them and then you go off and promise them you're going to take them to the top? Puh-leease." Says the golem who made a plan to go to the end with COLTON.

A smidge later, Kat updates Sabrina on Chelsea's waffling. Sabrina doesn't think much of it either, but her words have a bit more weight behind them as they're not loaded down with hypocrisy or evil. "[The women] want to go to the end. Going to the end requires some big-girl decisions. You gotta put on your big-girl panties and make a big-girl decision. You knew it was going to have to come to this." Hi, I'm immature and can never hear the phrase "big-girl panties" without imagining just a giant pair of bloomers with, like, three girls all trying to fit inside. Sorry.

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