Survivor
Guatemala Reunion

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Miss Alli: B- | Grade It Now!
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A Million Dollars' Worth Of Lip Venom

Of course, authenticity has its ups and downs, so let's discuss Jamie and Bobby Jon and their obvious love affair. Jeff thinks the whole thing was adorable. We look back at some of their battle moments, but when we come back to tribal council, they're all hugging and stuff. ["And Jamie is screeching at Bobby Jon all like, 'I wish I knew how to quit you!'" -- Wing Chun] Jeff says to Jamie that, clearly, they're friends now. Jamie says, "It's good to know there's still some good old country boys around." For a minute, I think Jamie is definitely drunk, but I ultimately decide that may just be the way he is. Perpetually having people lean over to each other and whisper, "Is he drunk?" That would be a hard way to live. "I love this kid!" Jamie adds, grabbing the back of Bobby Jon's neck. They so want to make out, you guys. And then Jeff poses the question to Jamie that many of us harbored all season: "Were you really losing your mind out there?" Jamie tries to be funny by doing an impersonation of himself saying that he heard there was to be a vote tonight, and that he almost didn't come. He grabs Rafe's shoulder and starts going, "Promise you won't vote for me? Don't you lie to me, Rafe!" See, dude, when it's disturbingly true, it's not that funny. Jeff points out that Jamie's inability to stop freaking out and asking about being voted off seems to have contributed significantly to his demise. Once he was voted out, did he wonder if he was losing his mind? Well, Jamie thinks maybe so. But he also was just competitive. It really is empty and makes no sense and it reeks of an attempt to come off as endearing. I would almost feel better if Jamie were drunk.

Commercials.

When we get back, we watch Gary and Amy "laughing" over the possibility that Gary was an NFL quarterback -- ha ha! Such a dangerous liar, that one. Jeff welcomes us back to discuss the big lie about Gary's NFL past. What's really stupid is that they don't even tell the truth about this, because people booted off the show have said over and over in post-game interviews that they knew perfectly well that Gary was a quarterback and that he was never fooling anyone, but that's not shown. Instead, Probst asks Danni how she alone knew who Gary was and saw through his brilliant charade. Her explanation is roughly that even though she works in sports radio, she wouldn't have recognized him except that her father and her brothers are giant football fans, and Cowboy fans in particular. She says that she had seen pictures of him, and that, at casting, she saw Gary and thought that she recognized him. She says that her first thought was that he was Brett Favre, which is actually not entirely impossible for me to understand, despite being way off, age-wise. (Though not necessarily way off, current-ability-wise.) (Also, it wouldn't be hard to confuse Brett Favre with an actual retired quarterback, given his constant need to remind you that he could retire at any minute, although not right this minute.) Danni says that, after that, she wound up at Central Michigan for a game, and she saw basically a shrine to Hogeboom. As weird as that is, there are two pieces of it that make me think it might be true. The first is that detail about Favre, and the second is that Danni mentions seeing him at casting rather than claiming to have recognized him on the island. Those are the two details that give the story an air of authenticity, despite its being very difficult to understand otherwise how she would have instantly recognized a long-ago NFL quarterback from a team that she wasn't watching at the time.

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