Survivor
Hell Hath Frozen Over

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Back-Up Plan

Next up is a plate of cheese, I guess, and a carafe of wine. Before Probst can even introduce it, Skupin bids $500. I don't think he understands how auctions work. He could have at least started lower, because a lot of people wouldn't even want that and then maybe he could have money left over for something else. Skupin confesses that he's not a drinker, so he might not drink the wine, but he demurs giving it to Probst, so now he's drunk, I guess. Next up is donuts and an iced coffee. Malcolm gets it for $200. As he bites into a donut, I think I just saw Malcolm's O-face, if you know what I mean.

The next item will stay covered, so it's a blind bid. Penner bids $100 and no one else wants to take a chance. Probst points out that neither Abi nor Lisa has bid on anything and Abi says that she knows she'll be going home soon and eating whatever she wants, so she's saving the money. No one points out that, if she really hated her tribemates so much, she could screw them over by taking their rewards. But that's because she's not saving the money to take home; she's saving it for a non-food reward. Anyway, it's revealed that Penner won fried chicken and French fries with ketchup. That looks awesome. Even Probst thinks so.

Carter and Malcolm bid against one another for the next covered item, with Carter eventually taking it for $200. It's a loaded baked potato. What cracks me up is that Probst keeps calling it a "bake batayta" and no one finds it funny. Is he eighty years old and from Ohio? Who says that? Anyway, Probst offers him a deal: he can keep the "bake batayta" or he can trade it for big sacks of beans and rice for the tribe. Carter weighs it over and decides to get the beans and rice. I think that's the right choice; he's got a lot of money left to pick up another item. Everyone cheers for him.

The next item is also covered. Lisa and Carter bid against one another. Lisa kind of looks like an asshole here; why is she making Carter spend all of his money when he just got food for the tribe? What they aren't showing -- but what was revealed on Twitter -- is that Carter won another item where he got a ton of meat or something.

Abi finally gets what she was waiting for; Probst unveils a scroll of some sort and says that it's an advantage in the game. Before he can explain further, Abi bids $500 and shuts it down. I can't believe no one else was ready for that possibility, although no one else had $500 left, so it didn't really matter. But couldn't they have talked ahead of time and convinced one person to sacrifice food to keep Abi out of it? Although I guess everyone else thinks his or her position is secure; it's not like you could just go up to Penner and say, "Hey, if Abi gets immunity, you're going home, so you might want to prevent her from getting any advantage in the auction." Plus, advantage doesn't mean she's assured of winning immunity, especially given that she's been so terrible at challenges thus far. Abi tells Probst, "There is no compassion towards me here," and everyone rolls their eyes at the martyrdom.

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Survivor

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