Survivor
Survivor

Episode Report Card
934 USERS: C+
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Goo Goo Gotchoo

The stupid Sprint player of the week commercial has Cirie as one of its candidates even though she's done nothing all episode. She wouldn't even cut the chicken's head off and she works in surgery! But there's fifteen minutes left, so...thanks for spoiling that, Sprint.

Malakal returns to camp, and Joel is the first to tell us that he's really disappointed in his team and hates losing. Then look in a fucking mirror, Joel. He thinks the only way for the team to start winning is to get rid of Chet. He tells Erik this, and Erik agrees. They both want Chet gone and screw the numbers. "This game is a game for strong people," Joel says. Yeah, because look at all those powerhouses who have won in the past. There have been some for sure, but there have been a lot more who got voted out, and early. This show has proven, time and time again, that it takes more than muscle to win this game. You'd think a "fan" would know that.

Joel continues to dazzle us with his charm as he says he's never encountered someone in his life who was so "spineless." "It's almost like he's a wet rag or a ball of goo. There's absolutely zero honor whatsoever in keeping somebody like that on our team." Except for last week, when that's exactly what you did. "If you went back to medieval times, I think we'd kill him ourselves," Joel finishes. Honestly, I really wonder how much of Joel's disgust with Chet is about Chet being "weak" and how much is about Chet being gay. The "spineless" and "wet rag" comments make me suspect this, as well as Joel's really personal-seeming disgust with Chet specifically. I mean, Kathy is just as weak and I never saw Joel say anything about her. While Chet suns himself on the raft, Joel tells Ozzy he wants to vote Chet out tonight. He makes some stupid card playing metaphor to justify this, but I don't care. Ozzy, of course, thinks this is a great idea.

Erik talks to Amanda and Cirie and asks if they're voting Chet out tonight. Amanda agrees with this, saying they should make their team as strong (and, I suspect, "Fan"-free) as possible. Cirie doesn't say much, but the wheels are turning in her head. She tells us that she doesn't mind getting rid of the "weaker" players -- except that she knows they consider her to be weak as well. I think it's time for her to earn that Sprint player of the week nomination! She goes to the woods with Chet and Tracy. Chet tells her that he blames Joel for today's loss, smartly noting that Joel didn't trust the three -- Cirie included -- to solve the puzzle and barked out orders from the sidelines. "Let's take his ass out," Tracy says, getting right down to it. Oh, I hope they can make this happen. Please please please!

Survivor

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