High School Friend Contest

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B | Grade It Now!
Poker In The Rear

Credits. So the scandalous new thing about the credits is that they've now removed everyone from the credits who didn't make the jury. The entire sequence is now divided into the remaining live players, followed by a title card reading "The Jury" and, at this point, just the one shot of Jaime. Just another part of the attempt to convince you that people who leave before the jury do not exist. The Man is out to get the pre-jury boots. The Man does not appreciate the pre-jury boots. The pre-jury boots need a union!

We open with a shot of the Great Wall, which where the next challenge will be? Oh, no, wait. It's actually totally irrelevant to the game. Someone should have warned me this would happen. We make our way to the shelter, where someone's sleeping toe has a giant fly on it. And it's shown in extreme close-up, so you can see every little fly leg and every little whorl on the person's toeprint. Thanks a lot, camera guys! Your Emmy will be .0002% insect parts, just like a hot dog. We find James out in the water in his little black shorts, gathering up the fishing net. He voices over that he's back with the gang now that there's been a merge, and that he thinks they need to stick together. He describes how different they all are, referring to Todd as a "stewardess" in the process. Oh, James. I don't think that was malicious in the slightest, but I do think it's kind of...not going to get you a free drink on your next flight. He says that they all pull together, but the point of the shot is James's hot behind, which they never get tired of showing, ever. I have to say, this is the first time I can honestly say I've seen parity on a show like this, where they are just as obsessed with lingering shots of James's ass as they usually are with lingering shots of somebody's boobs. It really doesn't qualify as progress. At any rate, James contemptuously says that the other team tried to be a "clique" to win "the high-school friend contest." James needs to sharpen his bon mots a little bit, because..."high-school friend contest"? That's sounding a little bit like he was improvising and ran out of steam before the sentence was over.

James brings a fish back to camp. Amanda tells us in an interview that James is in a very good position, what with the two immunity idols Todd gave him. She says that she's afraid of James winning the whole game, because in addition to the advantage Todd handed him, he's such a strong player. I wonder if anyone might take this to mean that Todd didn't do the world's cleverest thing by giving James those two idols. Maybe someone who was his ally should have talked him out of it at the time instead of acting like it was the most awesome plan she ever heard.

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