Survivor
High School Friend Contest

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Miss Alli: B | Grade It Now!
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Poker In The Rear

A discussion breaks out in which those not at the reward (Erik, Peih-Gee, Denise, Courtney, and Frosti) realize that they all sort of want J-R out, for what seem to be combined personal and strategic reasons. Everyone thinks Jean-Robert's kind of shady, and everybody would like a place to lie down in the shelter. Peih-Gee looks up at them all, like, "Dudes, there are five of us. Want him out? OUT!" I love how Peih-Gee is the one who's always trying to make people understand that they can just...vote, you know? I actually think that, particularly for someone who started out really, really badly, she's playing awfully well right now. The situation she was placed in was awful, and she's really a scrapper to still be in the mix this much. She interviews that, among other things, she doesn't have a lot to lose, what with her own ass so close to being imperiled, so she's perfectly happy to try anything that has a nonzero chance of success. She also tells Denise and Courtney that she'll make a deal with them that if she stays longer than J-R, she'll vote for either one of them who might make it to F2. Denise interviews that since nobody likes J-R anyway, "it's kind of an easy vote" if they decide to remove him. She tells us that she's "thinking it over." She tells the group flat-out that she's going to go with whatever alliance she thinks will work out best for her, and good for her, because this way, she doesn't have to get into complex loyalty games that never end well for anyone. "I wouldn't expect any different," Erik says. This conversation is entirely too mature. Bring back Jean-Robert!

That night, the reward people return to camp when everyone else is asleep. They tuck in, but J-R lies awake. He can't wait to get that immunity idol! He gets up and wanders around camp. Despite the fact that the clue could not be clearer about where the idol is, J-R goes up to a statue and removes the head, which...comes clean off. I don't think that's an authentic ancient stone statue, you guys. You can kind of tell J-R is feeling very puffed-up about going out on this mission, and a frog observes him and puffs out its throat repeatedly in solidarity. J-R interviews that he's incredibly anxious to get the idol, which could protect him and be his ticket to the million dollars. Finally, he fastens on the plaques hanging over the archways. It looks like he takes them all down, saying that he figures it might be one of those, so he's just going to take them all. As near as we can tell, the fact that Jaime already turned one in and it wasn't the right one doesn't figure into Jean-Robert's thinking at all, nor does it give him a hint that other people have already had these clues. I will give you an important piece of advice: this sequence is infinitely funnier if you, like I did, hear in your head Jeff Buckley's wonderful "Seat-Finding Song." I tend to hear that in my head whenever anyone is doing idiot physical comedy without realizing it. (Hint: the track is "Monologue: Musical Chairs," you can get it on iTunes for 99 cents -- although you should have the entire record if you want to be a completely fulfilled person -- and I promise you, it is worth the 99 cents, so please download and keep it. There are days when I swear to God, that is the only thing that makes me laugh.) (AAANYWAY.)

Baby monkey.

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