Survivor
I Have The Advantage…For Once

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Take Your Teeth And Go

Previously on Filthy Dirty Rats: The loved ones visited, and Parvati and her daddy won the challenge, yay! Go, Mr. Shallow! Jonathan went to Exile Island, and everyone else noticed that, with no one to pick on, Adam and Parvati picked on no one much less than they previously had picked on Jonathan. So they must not be so bad after all! The immunity challenge was very punishing, and Sundra looked like she about cracked her skull. Ozzy, of course, won. Adam told Yul that getting rid of Jonathan would win Yul jury votes, which was an obvious pile of crap, but which made Yul feel kind of trapped anyway. Jonathan tried to explain the reasons Yul shouldn't fall for this bit of nonsense, but ultimately, the Aitu four decided that dancing with the one that brought them wasn't as important as caving to social pressure to ostracize the uncoolest kid in the room. How do you make friends if not with a rousing game of Get A Load Of THAT Guy? Jonathan went home with everyone's vote but his own, and on his way out, he asked if they could please return his hat. You wouldn't think this would be important, but then, you wouldn't think Jeff Probst would actually try to interfere with the jury vote. But I'm getting ahead of myself. Who will be voted out tonight?

Aitutonga, Day 34. Jonathan's hat is ceremonially resting on a stake, which is a little bit creepy. It's like they ate him. Adam and Parvati are sitting in the shelter having their usual high-octane intellectual discussion. "Jonathan's gone," says Adam. "He's gone, so we gotta win it." Parvati recalls Jonathan's request for his hat, and Adam gives a "duh-huh" laugh. "I just feel better now that I'm in the game and Jonathan's not," Adam says in an interview. "Because, you know, he was just a nuisance." Adam goes on to tell us that he wants to stay in the game as long as possible. I think that's a winning strategy, son! He also wants to "crack the armor" of the Aitu four. See, Adam, what you do with armor is not "crack" it. Its imperviousness to cracking is what makes it armor. You're looking for the word "chink," which in this context is okay. Adam tells Parvati that the Aitu four are very tight, and that they're going to "need to try something." Adam is a master strategist. He's trying something! What will it be? Something! What? Something! Parvati spits out one of my favorite lines now, when she interviews, "I think Adam and I know that our position of power right now is very limited." Hey, she's a glass-half-full kind of girl. If a turtle were equally optimistic, he could choose to look at himself as having a very limited position of speed. Parvati says that staying will require "a lot of smooth talking." I think she's up to the challenge; what about you? She also says that she'll have to get people to flip without making it seem like a betrayal, but that the Aitu folks are "fiercely loyal to each other," which will make this difficult. "People are going to have to start turning on each other," she tells Adam. "Exactly," he agrees, because that's just what he was going to say when he was done chewing or breathing. They agree that, as "the underdogs," they will fight hard. What I love about that conversation is that you know if they had said anything interesting -- anything better than basically "we gotta do something" and "yuh-huh" -- the show would have used it. Those were, presumably, the highlights of their strategy discussion. The highlights.

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Survivor

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