Survivor
I Need Redemption

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Sara M: B- | Grade It Now!
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We Don't Need Spoken Words

Night falls on Upolu, and some of its members are hanging out on the beach, looking at the stars. Sophie suddenly calls Coach out and makes fun of his campfire stories, and everyone laughs at him, albeit in a good-natured and less hateful way than usual. Coach says he spent a long time talking to four of his tribemates and getting to know them better before bringing up what a good idea it is to have a strong alliance of five. It is, but not when one of the alliance members is Li'l Li'l Russell. Ugh. The other three - Rick, Albert, and Sophie - agree. Sucks to be Edna, I guess. She was the only person who was nice to Coach, but is she in his special alliance? No. Coach thinks he's in a much better position now than he was earlier. "This is Coach 3.0 and I'm here to win," he says. Well, that's got to be better than the Coach 1.0 and 2.0 versions, which were there to lose.

The next morning, Dawn tries to boil a pot of water, only to drop it on the fire and whine. Dawn interviews that she didn't sleep much last night and she's having a tough time. "I think I'm having a mini-breakdown," she clarifies. Oh, good! Another Holly. This should be fun. She complains to Mark about how she isn't used to drinking so little water and her calves are feeling cramped from the dehydration. It's Day 2, lady. Come on. Mark tells her to keep that quiet, because the younger tribemates will be looking for any reason to get rid of the older people. This causes Dawn to realize that in this game, she is considered "old." And for the first time in her life, she says, she feels it. I don't know if that's her age as much as it is the fall she just took when a vine she was trying to swing from like she's Tarzan snapped and sent her crashing to the ground. Dawn immediately insists that she's okay to Elyse, who has no interest in helping Dawn up or anything, then mutters that she's not sure if she's okay, wanders around a bit, and starts crying. What the hell is with the 40-something Midwestern women on this show? They all go crazy on, like, Day 2. Kathy, Holly, and now Dawn. Is it menopause? I don't get it.

Since enough people on her tribe aren't aware of what a liability Dawn is, she talks to Ozzy about it and starts crying again. No wonder she's feeling dehydrated! She just lost a good two gallons from her tears. Ozzy doesn't really seem to know what to say or have much interest in making someone who doesn't have big boobs - I mean, "say beautiful poetry" - feel better about herself. So while she cries and the Pianos of Sadness play, Mark interviews that Dawn's breakdown terrifies him because he thinks it will make the younger tribemates target her and therefore him as weak fragile old people. Dawn complains to Ozzy that she's ten years older than everyone else on the tribe and has no "common ground" with them, like that's his problem. It's not. Ozzy says a bunch of crap about how Dawn has what it takes to win this game and stay strong, then interviews that apparently, he's the "anchor" of this tribe so dealing with Dawn is part of his job. Oh, and that she could be first person to go home if she can't get it together.

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Survivor

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