Survivor
I Wanna See If I Can Make A Deal

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: A | 1 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
Take My Truck...Please

Previously on If Earl Or Yau Man Wins, I Will Forgive You For Jenna Morasca, Which You Have To Admit Is A Pretty Damn Good Deal, And I Will Throw In Stupid Aras For Kicks: Alex, whom Jeff calls "the last member of the 'four horsemen' alliance," because Jeff can't keep track of what became of four people, was on the ropes, or else was "a potential swing vote," depending on how you want to look at things. Alex tried to be a ninja, but had a mightily hard time making it past "shaggy-ass buffoon." At the reward challenge, Stacy was repeatedly smacked in the face with a big hunk of pork, which will never, ever stop being funny, even when we are all discussing it through ill-fitting dentures from our nursing-home beds. ["Sherioushly, Barry Gibb, find a new dentisht." -- Joe R] Earl went to Exile Island, where he got a clue to the location of the idol that was re-hidden after Alex burned it off while the universe laughed in his face. Alex came pretty close to winning immunity, but he didn't, and Boo did, because even gravity is not a member of Alex's alliance. Alex tried to hustle up a plan to boot Yau Man based on Yau Man's immunity idol, but he couldn't quite convince enough people in time, because even math is not a member of Alex's alliance. Thus, Alex went home to boo-hoo with his friends and tell them how to vote. They are members of Alex's alliance, but they are of substantially less use to him now.

Rays swim about, and then we are at Bula Bula on Day 34. As the background music tosses out both suspense chords and hick twanging, we learn that (of course) we are watching Boo being sneaky. He explains that he's trying to create a secret path to the water hole, with the idea that he can hide there, and when other people try to come there to have secret conversations, he can eavesdrop. I'm not sure how he's going to follow them without being suspected of anything -- "Okay, you go get water; I think I'll...take a little walk having nothing to do with you at all" -- but at least he's trying. He looks at us and whispers, "Sneaky is fun." It's like Hot Elmer Fudd, if there were such a thing, which there definitely should not be, so I am kind of concerned about myself now for even linking those words. I apologize. No one should believe in that concept except people who make earflap hats. And shotguns, and LET'S STOP.

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Survivor

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