I Wanna See If I Can Make A Deal

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: A | 1 USERS: A+
Take My Truck...Please

Yau Man next climbs into the tower, explaining that in addition to the other reasons to put himself on Exile Island, he also gets to have another clue. This one, as you'd expect, makes it pretty explicit where the idol is in particular -- especially because it uses the word "pining" complete with quotation marks around it, meaning it's a pine tree. The show certainly does like to hand it to you on a platter. With glitter on it. And chocolate frosting. They really might as well tie the idol to the third clue, to be honest. Cut out the middle man. And by "the middle man," I mean your primate brain. Yau Man says that he'll be sharing this with Earl, and with luck, one of them can track it down.

Truck. "Dreamz" reminds us that Yau Man gave him this big, beautiful truck, and now it's all his. The truck backs up and connects to a trailer. You do not see "Dreamz" driving here, which is not too surprising, since he previously announced that he didn't have a license, and I don't think you'd start your driving career by pulling a giant trailer through the pouring rain in Fiji. In fact, you can see that Boo is driving as they pull up at the school, anxious to see the happy little faces of all the happy little children. The truck arrives and honks, and all the Fijian kids go running out, in a scene that looks very uncomfortably staged. And why is Jeff Probst with them? Terrifying. He's even dressed in the school uniform. Or they're all dressed like him, which was the interpretation of my friend Jane Wiedlin's Boyfriend, who found it to be the most terrifying moment of the entire episode, this sea of Probstian children teeming from the school like something out of Dawn Of The Leathery Host Guys. Stacy talks about how great this was, seeing the kids, blah blah. I have to say, for a box of "school supplies," a hell of a lot of the contents of that box seems to be sporting equipment. I mean, the kids like it, but that's not what we call "school supplies" where I come from. "Board Games"? Where are the graphing calculators? Next, Jeff shows the teachers the "mobile office," which will allow them to have a sofa and a copy machine and, presumably, all the gossip their little hearts desire. One of the teachers says that all the swag will "lift the level of achievement" in the school. I sure hope so. Particularly their level of achievement in kicking, if the supplies are any indication.

Lunch! "Dreamz" strikes up a conversation with a little kid about how he's from America, and it's much colder there than it is in Fiji. Heh. He interviews that the supplies were a "step up" for the kids, just like the truck was a "step up" for him. And right here is where "Dreamz" says that he finally started thinking about what Yau Man gained in the deal. Way to catch the snap, dude. "Dreamz" realizes that if he gives away immunity to Yau Man at F4, he's probably going home himself. So all of a sudden, the truck doesn't look so shiny. So, quite correctly, "Dreamz" has figured out that his best bet would be getting rid of Yau Man before he gets to F4. One would think. Or one would think if one were thinking, which it appears maybe he was not, so much.

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