Survivor

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April Fool

Courtney and Candice have their second turn. Courtney falls on the netting again, while Candice is able to keep herself upright, thus catching up to Courtney. She takes the lead when she grabs her bag and jumps down to the netting while Courtney hesitates, rather smartly not trusting the jokers who put these challenges together to make sure the netting is completely safe and she won't plummet to her death. Courtney finally summons up the courage to jump, only to land on the net with her knees locked so that she kind of folds into herself and smacks her face on her knees. "FALL FLAT!" Probst scolds her, with an unsympathetic head-shake. Colby passes by a still-struggling Courtney on his way to grab the Heroes' last bag. He returns with it and J.T. and Amanda start work on the puzzle before Douche even touches the Villains' final bag.

The Heroes have had head-starts on puzzles before, though, and the Villains have always come from behind to beat them soundly. But J.T. and Amanda's strategy of placing the word pieces together works well for them, and soon all they have to do is put the remaining pieces around them. Rob and Sandra, meanwhile, look totally lost. They aren't even close by the time J.T. and Amanda are done. "We got whooped," Li'l Russell whines from his vantage point of the bench. The Heroes celebrate their victory and the Villains are sent home in defeat. Douche interviews that Courtney was lagging behind in the challenge and should be the person to go. No! I don't care how much she sucks at challenges -- she's hilarious and hates everyone and thus should stay as long as possible.

Suddenly, it's Day 18 when the Villains return to camp. I have no idea what happened to Day 17. I'll bet Danielle did a ton of stuff during it, though. Li'l Russell happily interviews that Rob, Courtney, and Sandra let the tribe down in the challenge, as we get a shot of Sandra totally face-planting while trying to run along the beach. That's embarrassing, but it's not like Sandra's lack of agility was why the Villains lost. In fact, if she had fallen face-first into the puzzle she probably would have done a better job. "It was one of the most pitiful performances I have ever seen," Li'l Russell concludes, apparently forgetting about every single challenge his tribe last season competed in. Rob and Li'l Russell find themselves sitting next to each other on the beach, and Rob asks Li'l Russell who he's thinking of voting for tonight. Li'l Russell says he wants to get rid of one of the weaker players. Rob asks for a name. "One of these," Li'l Russell says, nodding his head towards some people who must be off in the distance. But no! We then cut to a shot of Sandra and Courtney sitting right in front of him! Nice, editors. "Who?" Rob asks, not sure if he heard Li'l Russell right. "Right here," Li'l Russell says, pointing at them. Sandra, by the way, just shot Li'l Russell the most deadly of all glares. Li'l Russell is lucky he hid that machete, because she'd be using it to chop off his rumored huge balls (I just grossed myself out) if she had it. Courtney's demeanor didn't change. She doesn't care what Li'l Russell says. Rob is at a loss for words at this point, finally coming up with "that's not a way to gather friends." He's laughing as he says this, but his point is a good one: Li'l Russell still doesn't know how miserably he failed last season when it came down to jury votes, and just how important friend-gathering skills would be. Courtney musters up the energy to roll her eyes. "How do you two feel about that?" Rob asks Sandra and Courtney, still laughing in disbelief. "I don't like it," Sandra says. "Oh, no, I think he's right," Courtney scoffs. "What sort of logic is that, Russell?" Rob asks; "that's a new one." Sandra and Courtney are clearly intimidated by Li'l Russell's power play, as they are now braiding each other's hair and looking entirely unconcerned. "You'd be amazed how good that approach works," Li'l Russell says. Really? Because I don't think I recall Li'l Russell doing that during the Samoa season. I do, however, remember a bunch of people refusing to vote for him to win the million dollars because the way he treated them turned them off so much. Courtney cuts through the bullshit and says that even if Rob is going to vote for Sandra or Courtney, he wouldn't say it in front of them and Sandra and Courtney aren't going to vote for themselves, so there's really nothing more to say here. And yet, that doesn't stop Li'l Russell from interviewing that Rob is after him and he is after Rob. "May the best man win," he says. I love how Li'l Russell has this whole super rivalry thing cooked up in his head that Rob has yet to acknowledge and probably still doesn't care about.

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