Survivor

Episode Report Card
Sara M: B | 1341 USERS: B
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Sugar And Spice And Everything Nice

Meanwhile, Bob did get letters, and he's bawling his eyes out over them. He leaves the group so he can have the spotlight all to himself as he stands and sobs like no man I've ever seen. Or woman, really. Corinne comes over to get some camera time and hugs Bob. "Your family loves you, Bob!" she says, while forgetting to read the section of her mother's letter to her that warned her not to look trashy on national TV by threatening to stab another contestant in the face (spoiler!). Bob just makes some high-pitched unintelligible noises and has to sit down, weakened from all the emotion or possibly blood loss from papercuts from the huge pile of letters he received. Note that Randy's hands are papercut-free. Also, please recall that Bob is a high school physics teacher in Maine, which means that right now there are upwards of fifty Maine teens watching this and laughing their asses off. For the first time in their lives, they are looking forward to physics class tomorrow, where they will ask their teacher about how outside forces can cause a tear to decelerate as it slides down one's cheek. Bob starts reading, and the handwritten letter in nice handwriting is clearly from his wife, who begins her letter with talk of someone named Peggy and her recent phone call. The second paragraph starts with "It is 5:49 pm." Okay, Bob's wife is officially freaking boring. Randy stares at Bob, confused as to how anyone could have feelings for other people. Bob says the usual stuff about how getting these letters made him appreciate and miss his family all the more. "I can't wait to get home to them," he says. Be careful what you wish for, Bob.

Survivor

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