It Hit Everyone Pretty Hard

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B+ | Grade It Now!
So Long, My Lovelies

So Ami has a discussion with Tracy, in which Tracy wonders how tight Ami and Cirie are. I would summarize Ami's reaction as, "Pfft." So basically, Tracy and Ami agree that they, plus Erik and Chet, could vote Cirie off. Tracy and Ami agree that Cirie is cute and has a great smile, but nobody really knows what she's doing, and as stated, her attitude is on Ami's nerves. Ami explains that she's already been hosed in a situation where she tried to align with Cirie -- that would be when Yau-Man was voted out -- and now she kind of feels like maybe she won't go down that road again. Ami and Tracy share the news with Erik about voting out Cirie.

And now, Cirie, Amanda, and Ozzy are sitting around, and Cirie -- who thinks she's so very, very smart -- is wondering whether Jason or Chet found the idol. Ozzy reminds us that after he found the immunity idol, he made a fake one, which he left in the place where the real one was. Ozzy says he hopes Jason finds it: "From what I've heard, he might be naïve enough to believe that it's the real one." So...basically, he's saying, "I have heard Jason is really dumb, so if there's a mook who's going to fall for it, it's going to be that particular mook."

Exile Island, Day 15. Jason and Chet luxuriate in the water, as Chet says that he thinks Ozzy has the idol already. Chet adds that being here isn't that bad, because it will give his heel time to get better. "I'm just going to get a little organized, and then maybe go search for somethin'," Jason says. Wow, awesome cover. I don't know how Chet would figure out what you're doing. It's all about being very, very cagey. As Walter "Gib" Gibson would say: "I'm sorry I was late, but there was this...big problem...and I'm...late because of it."

Chet now explains to us that during a recent challenge, he jammed a piece of coral into his foot, which is now getting infected, so he's at the "end of [his] tether." He really does not want to be here, you can tell.

Jason follows the set of clues sending him all over the place. Jason tells us that Chet thinks Ozzy has the idol and has given up looking, but not him. He's still looking! And he follows and follows, and before you know it -- hey, he's right where the idol was! I mean, "is." And he pulls it out and unwraps it. And you can kind of tell that he's like, "Woo, woo, wooooo! Wooo...huh." Unfortunately, he can't hear the Mouth Harp Of Stupidity on the soundtrack that twangs to tell us he's an idiot as he tries to convince himself it's the idol. Because seriously, all Ozzy did was take a piece of wood, remove the bark, and put two slashes for eyes and one for a mouth. I was about to say you could make that in shop class, but if you made that in shop class, you would get the wedgie of a lifetime. From the teacher. "Well, I guess this is the hidden immunity idol," he says hopefully. "Uh, it's not much, but it's a carving of a piece of wood with a little guy on it? And, uh, this is pretty incredible, so you know I'm going to have to hold onto this tight!" And he tucks it in his pants. Seriously, y'all, he's convinced himself it's real. If he didn't think it was real, he wouldn't tuck it in his pants, and if he didn't figure it out the minute he saw it, he ain't going to figure it out later. "Ozzy doesn't have it. I have it, so this is really good for me." And then he shakes his fist. I wish I believed he was kidding, but I really, really do not. I really think he just...he doesn't understand. And of course, the most diabolical thing for the producers to do would be to make an immunity idol that looks like it could be fake, right? Tricky, tricky.

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