Survivor
Survivor

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: A- | 576 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
The Naked And The Figuratively Dead

Hatch jumps up on the platform that comes after the beam, so he's still heading forward towards the flag. He fetches one and returns. Sue goes out and fetches a flag, and she starts to head back as naked Hatch starts out. Meanwhile, Big Tom comes off the beam and winds up hanging from it by his hands, but he manages to clamber back up onto the beam. Pretty studly. He then meets up with Ethan coming the other direction. I would actually argue that, in slo-mo, it appears that Ethan gets the better of this match, but because of the way his hand slips, he does get into the water first -- again, I don't care for the "who hits the water first" method, though I don't know what else you would use.

Sue scampers back across the battle beam with no one there to battle her. From that platform, she has two choices to get back to her team -- right or left. The left beam is clear for the moment, and Hatch is just starting to come across the right beam from the other direction, toward her. Now, there's plenty of room for two people, or even three people, to stand on these platforms. There are several points during the challenge where at least two people share a platform. Sue initially surveys both beams, sees that Hatch is coming from the left, and takes a step onto the right beam. For whatever reason, though, she seems not to like that one as much. Rob calls out to her just to get on the beam, and she calls back, "I want this one," pointing to the left beam. "I gotta take my time." Impatient to get moving, she yells at Hatch, "Come on, baby!" Kathy, meanwhile, comes up to pass behind Sue on the platform and take the left beam.

As Hatch approaches, Sue tries to step right past him onto the beam -- she's taking that first step past him before he even reaches her, almost, so she doesn't appear to have been waiting around in order literally to have some kind of a smackdown with him. As Hatch reaches the beam, he pushes against Sue with his crotch -- he throws the hips forward, in fact, to make very sure that that's what happens, and as he does it, he says, "Want some, honey?" You can tell he makes a good solid contact with her, too, because it's enough of a bump to knock Sue into Kathy, who has to throw her arms out to rebalance herself. I would also point out that Hatch does not do this on his way past Sue. He stops, plants his feet, knocks against her, saying, "Want some, honey?," and then he goes by her. It's not incidental. Or accidental. Or remotely necessary. Not like you couldn't tell that from the lewd comment. She says something about "gross, Richard," and then she starts out onto the beam. If you look at the overhead shot that follows, he's got a good foot of platform on the other side of her that he can easily, easily, easily step onto at this point. He's essentially perpendicular to Sue as she starts to step out. Rather than turn away from her in the direction he's supposed to be going, he turns toward her so that he's pressing up against her back. Although he's blocking her from a good camera view, you can tell from where they are on the platform and how much space is behind him, as well as from the fact that you can see her foot between his two feet, that if he's not actually touching her, it's certainly not for lack of trying. The first one of these two shoves with the dick, you could almost call spur-of-the-moment total lunacy -- he's passing her, he loses his fucking mind, he decides it would be funny, he has no sense of boundaries at all, and he does it. But the second time? After she says "gross," and after she's trying to get onto the beam? That's just disgusting, and aggressive, and kind of disturbing. You can start to hear some protesting from the group on the platforms, and Jeff finally says, "Guys, come on, nobody cares about that stuff." I would have preferred, "Hatch, keep your dick to yourself," but I suppose you take what you can get. Interestingly, Hatch has no trouble discerning what Jeff is talking about, and he immediately turns around and starts across the beam.

Survivor

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