Time to make our way over to the reward challenge. Jeff calls in the teams, and Rich snots that "Sue's still here" when he sees Chapera. They all note the absence of Amazon Rob. The way the challenge will work, Jeff explains, is that two team members will board the raft. They'll then paddle out and "rescue" two more team members on separate floating platforms. Then everybody paddles back, you run up the beach to the finish line, and you're done. Pretty straightforward. Oh, and there are some flags to grab along the way, because there are always flags to grab. And what's the reward? A set of hooks and a fishing spear. Also, for the first two tribes, a key to the lockbox if you still need one. Oh, and there's one other thing: the tribe that finishes last will be dissolved and scattered to the two other tribes, whether they want your sorry ass or not. The losing tribe members will also not be returning to their old camp, so while their personal stuff and clothes will be brought to them at their new homes, their shelters and reward and stuff will be lost to them forever. Yeah, Rupert. You'd better win, because if you have to go somewhere else, they're not bringing you your sinkhole. Big Tom is sitting out for Chapera, and Shii Ann is sitting out for Mogo Mogo.
The rafts take off. Before long, the Mogo Mogo Silver Bullet goes streaking away from the rest of the teams. "The worst-looking raft of the three," as Jeff points out, is performing the best. Mogo Mogo picks up Kathy and heads for Hatch. Alicia and Jenna are picked up by the other two tribes shortly thereafter. The Mogo Mogo lead increases. Hatch hops aboard the Silver Bullet. There's an effort here to force me to find Ethan hot, with the shirtless rowing and everything, and...I almost could. But not quite. Which is odd, because a test I took today pronounced that the types of men I find attractive are "Professors" and -- yes, ladies and gentlemen -- "Pretty Boys." I am not making that up. (It also pronounced me "Very Picky." Hmph.) Anyway, Chapera picks up Amber. Saboga picks up Jerri. There's more paddling, but nothing's going to change. Saboga is way too far behind at this point, and Mogo Mogo is way out ahead, so the order is pretty well determined. It's interesting, because one thing that appears to be supremely wrong with the Saboga barge is that there's nowhere to put your legs down through that's comfortable. The other teams built their boats so that you could sit on them comfortably with your feet hanging down. And while the drag from the legs might seem bad, I don't think it's nearly as bad as the loss of power that you can tell Saboga is experiencing from not really being able to sit comfortably and dig in -- that's why Ethan is kneeling the entire time. You can see that the other three just can't get any power behind their paddling at all, because they can't get up over the paddles. I can't explain the physics, but sitting on your butt with your feet out in front of you is no way to get power to your arms, it seems to me. Anyway, Mogo Mogo is first to get across the finish line, followed by Chapera. And Saboga, the worst tribe ever, will be mercifully done away with. Not since my last glass of Tang has dissolution been so very welcome. As Mogo Mogo is waiting in a huddle on the beach for the other tribes to finish, they recall that Jeff said the other tribes would be picking the members of the dissolved tribe, with the first team to finish picking first. They discuss that first pick. "We've gotta get rid of Ethan," Colby mutters. "Bring him along, Rich." They all appear to agree to take Ethan just in order to take Ethan out. After the stragglers make their way up onto the beach, Saboga shares one final group hug -- because who wouldn't mourn the loss of a tribe so mighty? Ah, never have so many suffered so much because so few knew so little about so many properties of water.