Survivor

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Losers Find A Way To Lose

Brendan sets off to look for the idol. He starts at the wooden statue next to the treemail box. He shakes it and examines it and finds nothing ... until he looks up its skirt and finds a small hole with the idol sitting inside. Wow, I really underestimated Brendan's idol-finding abilities. I also overestimated the people behind the scene's maturity level. I mean, they basically gave the poor treemail statue a butthole and shoved an immunity idol up it. Brendan is very happy about this, and never misses an opportunity to remind us about his entrepreneur skillz and how they relate to this game. As he hides the idol under a rock, he says that both in business and in Survivor, he isn't trying to make money -- he's trying to win.

The sun is setting, but then we go back to Camp Tempura and it's still plenty light out. How much last-minute scrambling and scheming do we really have to see? The tribe enjoys a pot of beans, especially Jerry since this is another chance to show off how sick he is. Erinn interviews that she wants to put the spotlight on Jerry, but not in a way that will turn people off of her. Too late, Erinn! You smiled that one time so you're screwed. She says people who don't want to be here (Jerry) should be sent home, so that the people who do want to be here (Erinn) can stay. Brendan asks Jerry how he's feeling on a scale of thumbs down to thumbs up. Jerry gives him a sideways thumb. He claims he's feeling better, then remembers that he needs to be feeling worse if he wants to be voted out and says all he needs to be one hundred percent is a cheeseburger, which pretty much tells you that he's already got his menu planned for tonight after he gets voted out. I don't know about you guys, but when I have a real stomachache, the last thing I want is a freaking cheeseburger. But when it's a fake stomach ache to get me out of something I don't want to do, then yes, cheeseburgers sound delicious.

Tyson interviews that Jerry's "illness" has made him a candidate to go home tonight, but he's really hoping for a blindside, because those are awesome. And blindsiding Erinn would look especially cool because she wants to be here so bad. "I love seeing people cry when you crush their dreams," Tyson says. Ew, Tyson is gross. As much as he tries to separate himself from Douche by making fun of him in interviews, I don't think they're all that different.

Finally, it's time for Tribal Council. Douche really dressed up for the occasion, sporting his very best Seagaltail. Probst talks to Tyson first, asking him how important the momentum that Tempura doesn't have is in this game. Tyson says it's very important, but it doesn't take much to get it back. If they can focus and get things together to win the next challenge, then they'll be fine. Probst brings up the last challenge, and how Erinn was plenty focused and had a plan to build the staircase, only for things to fall apart as soon as the tribe stopped listening to her. Erinn says that's exactly right - she knew where every crate was supposed to go, and her team second-guessed her and lost time, only to end up doing what she wanted them to anyway and losing because they didn't do it fast enough. You might not want to blow your own horn too much there, Erinn. Douche can get away with that, for some reason. But not you.

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Survivor

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