Man Down

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B | Grade It Now!
Quarterback, Sneak

So now, Judd is out on the course for Nakum, but Rafe is still trying to get up the damn ladder, doing everything possible to distinguish himself as That Guy Who Can't Do Challenges. As Judd struggles with the web, Rafe finally drags his ass up out of the water onto the net and immediately stumbles toward his team like he's on the wrong side of about eight shots of tequila. There is definitely something going on there besides sheer wimpitude. Jeff comments that "four days of no water" is having an effect. Do they really have no water? Why? Don't they have a lake? And fire to boil water with? I'm very confused. Maybe Jeff just means it's been four days without bottled water. I know that takes a toll on me. It's like going without my bag of air. Rafe finally gets back, and Morgan heads out for Yaxha. Judd, meanwhile, quits without retrieving a bag. Morgan gets to a bag as Danni heads out for Nakum. I have to say, whatever else can be said about Danni, she has some impressively freaky abs. You could pelt her with rocks and she wouldn't even feel it, not that I'm suggesting we do that. Yet. Morgan gets a bag. Brianna goes next for Yaxha, but she isn't able to get a bag and she falls in. As Lydia goes out for Yaxha, Danni finally gets a bag and heads back. So while Danni and her abs got the job done, she was not speedy. Lydia gets a bag for Yaxha as Brooke heads out onto the web for Nakum.

When Lydia gets back and Jamie heads out again, we're tied at six bags each, with two each to go for each team. Brooke gets her bag down for Nakum. Jamie gets his down, and Blake and Brian are now on the course chasing down the last bags for their respective teams. They both do very well on the course, but Blake gets to the bag faster, and has a slight lead heading to the ladder. He drags himself up onto the net, and although Brian gives it quite the effort, he can't beat Blake, who collapses across the finish line in a heap. Jeff sends Yaxha home with nothing, and he gives Nakum the coveted fishing stuff. Bobby Jon lends Blake a hand getting back home. Boys who help! That's sexy.

Nakum, Day 5. Crocodile eyeballs above the water. The team, in a boat, fishing. Farmer Beavis explains that they got up "at the butt-crack of dawn" (still hilarious!) and went out. He manages to be the first we see pull in a fish, and the fish is...about the size of your palm, maybe. If you have small hands. Then as Blake dangles a line in the water, he says he's feeling better and "not panting as much." Well, that's...fortunate, but somehow disappointing. He thinks that as long as he stays strong in the challenges like he did at the web thing, he'll be all right. Nakum continues catching a stellar collection of the world's smallest fish. I think they've accidentally stumbled into a community of fish descended from a bedroom aquarium.

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