Man Down

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B | Grade It Now!
Quarterback, Sneak

Yaxha, Day 5. Without any fishing stuff, the disadvantaged team resorts to pulling roots out of the ground. Rafe explains that the team is "in desperation food mode." Basically, if it's in the woods, they'll consider eating it. Presumably not including crew members. Rafe produces a large grasshopper, which he introduces with the enticing offer, "Does anyone want to eat a grasshopper?" It isn't clear whether anyone actually does. What total wimps! They used to eat rats on this show; doesn't anyone remember? Meanwhile, camp life is beginning to develop to the point where our first gripe about workload has appeared: Gary doesn't think that Morgan does her share. We watch as she delicately swishes water around in her mouth. Swish all you want, Swishy McSwish -- you've got a mouth like a spoiled trout at this point. I have a feeling her team has already reached the idyllic moment when all the pressure is off, also known as The Moment When No One Can Smell Anyone Anymore.


And then, by way of illustration of Morgan's so-so work ethic where non-supernatural occupations are concerned, we watch as she sits with her feet in the water while busy bee Lydia works on her next great plan. Lydia has constructed a little "cove" out of sand, and she somehow intends to cover it with a sack and catch minnows. Handy fishmonger! Elsewhere, Rafe has a protein-gathering plan of his own, involving the breaking open of an ant nest. He and Jamie and some other folks discuss the ants, and my favorite part is that they seem to be disappointed that the nest contains ants instead of termites. Like maybe termites are really delicious, and nobody would have balked at eating termites. They bring the nest back to camp, and a clearly grossed-out Steph takes it in with a nauseated expression. She interviews that while she understands that ants may be high in protein, she doesn't plan to eat ants. She will be eating corn and water until she wins something else. Meanwhile, however, Lydia has brought back ten minnows. They're very small, but protein-wise, it's something. The group cooks up the minnows at the fire and then pops them all in their mouths. Lydia slyly interviews about how the way to a man's heart is through his stomach and so forth, and with the tribe being as hungry as these people are, she may have a point, especially this early. For fish as big as your finger, the minnows do seem to generate some excitement.

At Nakum, Blake is back to the bending over and the breathing hard. Judd looks baffled as Blake drops to the ground again. And then, in an interview, Judd talks haughtily about how Blake "does basically nothing in camp." Not only that, but Judd's clearly irritated with Margaret for "nurturing him." Yeah. Stupid nurturing. I hate nurturing! That's the thing I fucking hate about the medical profession -- they're always trying to make people feel better, those pussies. God. Margaret gives Blake some water, which is very...damning, I guess. Judd prattles on about how much he hates listening to Margaret tell Blake to relax and get water. "How much more relaxing does this dude need, man?" he asks. Well...if he's sick, moron, then perhaps quite a bit. I really don't think the guy is a malingerer. I mean, what would be the motivation for that? To fake shortness of breath? It's terrible for your odds of staying in the game.

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