MONDO EXTRAS

Sarge opened with some kind words about the fact that he was an honorable and upstanding person, and he therefore wanted Twila to know that he wouldn't even want to speak to her if he saw her walking down the street. And then he asked her whether one million dollars was the "price tag to cast [her] son's name straight to hell." He followed up by declaring that if his mother had done the same, he would instruct his mother to kiss his ass. (God: "Good one!") Sarge threw in an absolutely bizarre knife-twist by telling Twila that even though he thought she was a morally reprehensible person, he was going to vote for her, because he thought she needed the money more. It turned out that this was Sarge's little trick to test Chris and see if they'd still be friends. And not a very crafty trick, either.

Between the outright goofiness of Sarge's "your son will now go to hell" theory, his explanation of the precise circumstances under which he would tell his mother to go fuck herself, and his insistence that he knew Twila's son wouldn't forgive her even if she didn't, Sarge is the "I suck" champion. But a close second would be Fiji's Lisi, who used her jury question as an opportunity to quiz "Dreamz" about how many zeroes are in a million, apparently hoping to catch the less-educated former street kid in a mathematical error. She did prove a point, though maybe not the one she intended: she proved that before attempting to embarrass someone else about knowing how many zeroes are in a million, it's important to make sure you know how many zeroes are in a million.

Alex (Fiji)
"My question is: STOP TRYING TO ANSWER MY QUESTION!"

Alex wasn't just a lawyer. There's nothing wrong with lawyers, honest. But Alex was the kind of lawyer who believed that certain kinds of behaviors are expected of lawyers, and he didn't want to disappoint. Thus, Alex decided that he would personify every terrible stereotype of the Great Big Jerk Attorney, and he further decided that the best object for his rage would be...Cassandra. The great, powerful, malevolent, and deeply in need of a head-butt Cassandra. Sure, she seemed like a nice, passive, harmless lady who simply played a steady game to get to the end, but Alex knew deep in his heart that she was an undiscovered bad person, and he made it his goal to out her as such.