Survivor
Now That's A Reward

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Miss Alli: C+ | Grade It Now!
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The Brady Punch

It's interesting, because a number of people on the forums thought that the presentation of Da was really uncomfortable, like he was being "given away" like a slave. While I would never claim Survivor is necessarily above an offensive dynamic like that, in this case, I more had the sense he was being given away like a very expensive consultant. True, he'll show you a few things and do some things for you in the process, but for the most part, he's going to show you how to do stuff, because he's smart, and you're not. It didn't bother me, although I am curious as to whether that's the way Da typically dresses. I suppose it easily could be. ["I was waiting for him to break character and confess that he has an engineering degree from CalTech or something." -- Wing Chun]

All of the castaways believe that time with Da is well worth competing for. Just one time, I would love it if they all said, "No, Jeff, as a matter of fact, we think this contest is just too goddamn stupid, and we're all going home to eat cockroaches." Imagine the hilarity. The teams line up in front of the open field where all of the objects are arranged. Chad is first to go and uncover two items. First, he uncovers a wooden pig. Next, he turns up what Jeff is calling a "tam-tam." Don't look at me; I don't know anything. Chad returns, unsuccessful. Lisa is next to go, and if you don't see the humor in Lisa being the first one to go in search of a pair, you're a better person than I am. Lisa uncovers a shrimp trap. And then, a coconut. Rory turns up a tribal drum, and then, a wooden idol. Speaking of wooden idols, isn't it about time for another Clay Aiken joke? I haven't gotten a poorly spelled piece of hate mail with no capital letters in parts of it and nothing but capital letters in other parts of it in so long.

Scout uncovers what Jeff tells us is a gourd, although it looks to me like the top of a superhero's spell-hurling cane. They have some crazy-ass gourds down there in Vanuatu. She then turns up a nautilus shell. Jeff promises that there will be a match soon, which I think means he doesn't know these people very well. Next to look for a match is Travis. This ought to be fun. Travis uncovers him a grapefruit. Jeff comments that he's only thinking about one thing. "Yeah, eatin' it!" offers Twila. Yeah. Glad she's keeping up. Nothing like finishing the part of Jeff Probst's joke that was too obvious for him to make you seem like a wit. Travis then uncovers the tribal drum. Lisa and Twila immediately know that this is their first shot at a match. Ami walks out onto the playing field and uncovers one tribal drum, and then the other. The women have the first match. I think it's charming that Ami wears skirts to challenges, but I do think she's a little too fancy for the room. Also, sunny yellow skirts have a way of looking rather dingy and unpleasant after you don't wash them for a month.

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Survivor

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