Now Who's In Charge Here?!

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B+ | Grade It Now!
Requiem For A Queen Bee

Now, you begin to see the genuinely unpleasant person Ami is, when she says to Twila, "I'm just glad I didn't swear on my little brother or my family, 'cause that would be real yucky." Okay, first of all, "yucky"? What's next, a frowny-face tattoo? Second, please keep in mind that the person who dragged Ami's little brother into this discussion of reality-show moralizing was Ami. And if that's not "yucky," I just don't know what is. Furthermore, I realize that oath-taking is an old and sacred tradition, but this entire thing with "swearing on" people is so stupid. The only people who really care about maintaining some kind of a "I swear on so-and-so" system are people who want everyone to agree to some kind of system of "safe words" so they can lie all they want and then be able to repurchase their credibility for one "I swear on my father's grave" or whatever. It seems like a load of hooey to me. "I swear on my son," "I swear on that tree," "I swear on my children," who cares? It's all lying. Lying is generally bad in real life with the usual white-lie exceptions, but it's not bad on Survivor, because lying is part of the game. I mean, it doesn't actually endanger your son if you swear on your son and you're lying. That doesn't actually cause your son to die, unless you live in a Stephen King novel, so it has nothing to do with how much you love him or how important he is to you. What is the difference between saying, "I give you my word," and "I swear on my son"? Nothing. In both cases, in real life, you should be telling the truth. In both cases, in Survivor, it makes no difference.

The reason Ami is mad, it appears to me, is that she misjudged Twila to be some kind of a backwards hick who, in Ami's mind, would never swear on her son and lie. That's what I think. Ami believed that she had Twila pegged as the sort of simpleton who believes in Elvis sightings and believes that you will kill your son if you swear on his name and you're lying. In other words, Ami thought Twila had an identifiable weakness, which was a superstitious, unsophisticated belief in the validity of swearing on things or people. Turns out Twila was faking that quality, largely. And Ami is angry as all hell, because she has been flat-out beat by Twila, whom Ami has never respected, ever, going so far as to lecture her about her femininity in front of a group of other women, which, seriously? One does not do, particularly when one is talking to a woman who has had a child, and presumably is thus familiar with her femininity and has managed just fine up to now without French braids. Ami, I believe, resents being outsmarted by a southern highway worker.

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