Survivor

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Sara M: B+ | Grade It Now!
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God and Chickens Speak to Shambo

That night, the camera crew and editors got really bored and decided to go crazy with shots of Shambo sleeping, the chickens, a crab, and I think there's a solar eclipse thrown in there for good measure. Shambo tells us that God made her "really special." I agree. Shambo is special. But I think her and my definitions differ. She thinks she's awesome because she's had about 30 clairvoyant dreams. "I think it's God's divine intervention at work," she says. Does Shambo really think God has nothing better to do than welcome chickens to heaven and give her psychic dreams? Come on. Anyway, Shambo dreamt last night that Dave Ball was voted out and she believes it's God's will, and not, you know, just her being mad at Dave Ball and letting her newfound power go to her head. The next morning, she goes to Li'l Russell and says Dave Ball must be the next person out. "Set in frickin' stone," she says. Li'l Russell agrees with this, then interviews that he was perfectly happy to encourage Shambo's crazy thoughts that God was telling her to vote Dave Ball out. He laughs at her. If I didn't already hate Li'l Russell so much, I'd probably really like him now. Too bad the editors made him so hateful in the beginning. Li'l Russell goes to Natalie and tells her the plan is to vote for Dave Ball because that's what Shambo wants and she's unstable. "Oh my word," Natalie says.

With that, it's time for the immunity challenge. Probst takes back the immunity necklace and explains the challenge. Each contestant has a station with a rope with several knots in it attached to a "very heavy log." All the contestants have to do is hold onto the rope and keep the log from falling and breaking a porcelain tile. Every three minutes they have to switch hands and move down to the next lowest knot. The lower they get, the heavier the log will feel. I hope the logs are weighted differently according to the contestants' gender and weight, or else this is kind of unfair. As for Jaison's immunity advantage, he gets to move his hand two knots up at any point during the challenge.

With that, the contestants grab the first section of rope with their right hands. Shouldn't they be allowed to choose which hand they want to start with? It's not fair to the left-handed people if they're stuck holding the final piece of rope with their weaker right hand, or vice-versa. Anyway, the challenge begins. It's uneventful until nine minutes in, when Jaison decides to use his advantage and move his hand back up to the second knot while everyone else is on the fourth. Probst seems to disapprove of how early Jaison used his advantage, although it doesn't really matter how early you use it because that two-knot advantage lasts for the duration of the challenge, so it's really in Jaison's best interest to use it as soon as possible, I'd think. 21 minutes in, no one has let go of the log yet and it's time to move down another knot. Shambo can't take it, and lets go of her log in the most comedic way possible. It hits the tile with a glass breaking sound effect as she tumbles backwards off her podium and flails around in the grass. Li'l Russell finds her antics so hilarious that he starts laughing and lets go of his log, although he claims it was because he got a charley horse in his forearm. With that, it's time to move to the final position on the rope. This is the very end, where there is no knot, making it that much easier for the rope to slip through your fingers. Except for Jaison, who gets to stay two knots above that for the rest of the competition. I think he should have to move down every three minutes until he's at the same spot as everyone else, but whatever.

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Survivor

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