Episode Report Card
Sara M: B+ | Grade It Now!
God and Chickens Speak to Shambo

Probst asks Dave Ball how he thinks Shambo feels about him. "I've done my best to be (pause while he tries to find the right words, which probably don't exist) as honest and kind as I can with Shambo," Dave Ball says. Amazing how he can be diplomatic and sincere while at the same time talking about Shambo like she's a nasty child incapable of self-control. Probst turns to John and asks him if he thinks he's one of the people that Shambo thinks deserves to win this game. John has no idea what people really think of him, so he says he's sure that Shambo thinks he's worthy. Probst asks Mick if tonight's vote is going to be a blindside like the past three have been. Mick says he doesn't think so -- everyone brought his stuff to Tribal tonight so obviously everyone must think there's a chance he could be next out. Well, except Jaison. I think he'd be surprised if he was voted out. You know, since he has immunity. Li'l Russell, on the other hand, says he does think the person being voted out tonight will be surprised. As for Shambo: "I don't think they're gonna be shocked at all." And Dave Ball says that he'll only be shocked if tonight's vote goes the way he's expecting it to, which makes everyone laugh. Including Probst, who never likes to admit that a contestant made a funny and also probably has trouble laughing because of all the botox. So that was impressive. John gets the last word, saying there are "two potential names" going home tonight and both of them have said they wouldn't be surprised to be voted out tonight. Way to be so confident about tonight's vote that you basically publicly state who you think will be going home, John. That's good gameplay and won't come back to bite you in the ass at all.

With that, they vote. Shambo votes for Dave Ball, saying "thanks for the chickens. They were great friends." No, Shambo. They were not great friends. Because they are chickens. And also because you ate them, which is a serious friendship-ender. I don't think I've seen any friendships come back after one friend eats the other. John votes for Mick. Dave Ball votes for John, actually apologizing to him for having to do so. Don't apologize to John, Dave Ball. He screwed your alliance over and thinks he's better than you and me and everyone else ever.

Probst reads the votes: one for Mick. John smiles confidently even though that vote for Mick is his own and thus proves nothing. The second vote is Shambo's vote for Dave Ball, who looks ready to grab his bag and leave. Then there's his vote for John, which Shambo rolls her eyes at while John just nods and smiles, so certain are they that Dave Ball's fuck you vote for John won't mean anything. But then there's a second vote for John, and boy does his face fall! With the third vote, he starts to do some mental math in his head to make sure those three votes are from Dave Ball, Monica, and Brett. The fourth vote for him must therefore be from Foa Foa, and that's when he's really surprised. "He's so screwed," Laura whispers. What a great prediction from Laura that was! It's not like it isn't completely obvious at this point or anything. Dave Ball, meanwhile, is pretty damn pleased. With five votes, John is out. Mick can't help but throw a smile at the jury while Shambo's shock is obvious. "She has no idea what happened," Laura whispers happily. Yes, but that's kind of been the case with almost every Tribal Shambo's been to, and it hasn't affected her game at all since, you know, she's still there and hasn't had a vote cast against her yet, I believe. John says good-bye to the "boys" on his way out. Shambo is the only person who says good-bye back. While the jury celebrates, Dave Ball winks at them like he had anything to do with this and wasn't just seriously lucky that Li'l Russell decided to stir things up.

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