Survivor

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Immunity challenge time! The tribes arrive and Erinn and Joe are brought in. Tempura pretends to be happy to see Erinn and give her an awkwardly insincere group hug. Probst explains the challenge: each group will have a slingshot they must use to break a tile. When the tile breaks, a whole bunch of sand dumps out, causing another tile to be revealed and a bag of puzzle pieces to fall. When all three bags have been collected from all three broken tiles, two players per tribe will be charged with solving the puzzle, which involves putting a bunch of wound-up snake pieces on a board. Debbie sits out for Tempura, and we begin.

Shooting first for Jalapeño is J.T., who has no doubt spent most of his idyllic Alabama childhood doing exactly this. Tyson is shooting for Tempura. Probst says that they can shoot for the entire game or take turns with other teammates. That seems unfair; I'd rather see everyone take turns shooting. Probst says go, and Tyson is the first to break a tile. He does an annoying victory shrug while he waits for the sand to run out and release the bag and the next tile. He grabs the bag and brings it to the game board while Douche cheers him on, saying "all you, all you!" because Douche is determined to make it through this entire game without participating in any challenges. J.T. breaks his first tile, and hands the first bag off to Joe and says he's going to keep shooting. His second tile has only been partially revealed when he gets a hit on it. Tyson's tile is fully revealed when he shatters it, but J.T.'s puzzle bag swings down first with Tyson's not far behind. And then things go a bit wrong for Jalapeño. Because J.T. didn't break his first two tiles definitively like Tyson did his (only chipping corners away as opposed to shattering the entire tile), the sand is much slower to leak out of his second tile and so the third tile is much slower to be revealed. That means that J.T. only has the top third of his tile to shoot at while Tyson has his entire target. J.T. does manage to nick the corner a few times, but sand only dribbles out as Tyson nails his last tile. While he grabs the last puzzle bag for Tempura, Joe asks J.T. if he wants to let someone else try. J.T. does not. "I'll come over and do it if you want," Tyson offers so obnoxiously. While Sierra laughs loudly at this, Douche actually has the decency to just smirk silently. I can't believe I just wrote that.

Erinn and Brendan work on the puzzle for Tempura. Meanwhile, J.T. finally gets a slightly larger piece of corner broken off his tile, and it's enough to release the last bag. Joe and Stephen work on the puzzle, but Brendan and Erinn have had a good head start. They solve it first, and Tempura wins again. This is devastating news for me, because it means that Douche can't be voted out and he'll almost definitely make the merge and the jury. NOOOOO!!!! J.T. takes the blame for Jalapeño, but Taj tells him not to beat himself up. Whatever. Just to rub things in, Probst asks Douche how it feels to know there's no chance he's going home tonight. Douche says it feels great and it's a pivotal win because now Tempura is going into the merge with a numbers advantage. UGH. For the post challenge wrap-up, Sydney says going to Tribal Council is not a good thing (duh), and while Joe told her she's safe, she can't be 100% sure of that. "It really just sucks," she concludes. Thanks, Sydney, for your valuable insight. By the way, as much as I wanted Jalapeño to win this challenge, I pretty much knew they didn't when the stuff in last week's previews about J.T. thinking of screwing over Taj hadn't happened yet when the challenge started. Since we almost always only see the losing tribe after the immunity challenge, that pretty much meant that Jalapeño lost. Thanks for spoiling me, CBS. You're almost as bad as the Sprint Player of the Week.

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Survivor

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