Survivor
Panicked, Desperate, Thirsty As Hell

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The Removal Of Rudy

Previously on Everyone Who's Going To Be Rolling Right Over His Ex-Girlfriends, Take One Step Forward -- Not So Fast, Ethan: Saboga. Chapera. Mogo Mogo. There was no fire, and no fire meant no water, unless you wanted to risk an outbreak of Panamanian brain worms, which Sue did. Rudy and Rupert formed an early alliance based on honor, although they could also have formed one based on being placed next to each other when Jeff calls the roll alphabetically. Ethan and Tina formed an early alliance based on the buzzards circling overhead. Boston Rob and Amber "made a connection," as Jeff puts it, and you are certainly competent to insert your own porn soundtrack, I suspect. At the immunity challenge, early bumbling by Saboga that looked to be the result of miscommunication between self-appointed big men Rupert and Ethan was too much to overcome, and while the other teams celebrated, Saboga prepared for tribal council. Despite Tina and Ethan's efforts to recruit Rupert and Rudy to send Jenna back to her beauties, Jenna and Jerri ganged up with Rupert and Rudy to boot Tina. Ethan whined bitterly, as he is wont to do, upon learning that Jenna wasn't interested in handing him any more free money than he already has. At a soaking-wet tribal council, Tina took a most ungracious fall, while everyone concentrated on how to transport rainwater from the sky into their mouths as efficiently as possible. "Who will be voted out tonight?"

Credits. Golly, everybody sure does look wet.

We return from commercials, and it's Day 4 at Saboga. Jerri sits inside the shelter (which, if Dalton Ross is to be believed -- and Dalton Ross is always to be believed -- she did quite a lot), staring out at the rain. Rupert voices over, as we watch Rudy stroll on the beach, that coming back from tribal council without fire was "devastating." He says that between the pouring rain, the loss of Tina, the thirst, and the disappointment of not being allowed to bring the torches back with them, they were mightily depressed. Furthermore, because they did expect to bring the torches back, they actually left the pot at camp full of nasty well water when they left, thinking they'd boil it when they got back, so they didn't even come back to a pot full of rainwater that they could use. Ouch. Rupert, with most uncharacteristic understatement, calls this "a bad way to end Day 3." Seriously, cold, wet, no food, no water...that's not even a good way to end Day 3 of your sentence in federal prison. It's always interesting seeing people take on conditions voluntarily that would violate the Eighth Amendment if they were inflicted on you against your will, just so that they can be on television.

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Survivor

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