Jeff asks Shawn about his feelings about Jon, pointing out that the two of them almost had a fist fight. Jeff asks Shawn what kept him from hitting Jon, and Shawn says probably just the fact that he was voted off before he got around to it. Heh. Shawn goes on to say, in a way he hopes is subtle, that he thinks everyone wanted to beat Jon's skull in, so he wasn't alone, but none of them actually did it, because it's just not done. Jeff points out that there are really only two big rules in the game after all -- no hitting, and no "conspir[ing] to share the money." Therefore, was Jon hoping that Shawn might hit him and get bounced? Sure, Jon says. That would have been nifty. He also hoped maybe Rupert would hit him! Har, har! Isn't he funny? Sigh. Whatever. Isn't it over yet?
Jeff now asks Andrew what he thinks makes Jon a good player, in the sense that he went far in the game. Andrew says that Jon had "a great read on people," blah blah blah. It's Andrew, trying to make himself sound smart, as usual. He also says Jon just has an ability to lie convincingly. How observant.
Next up, Jeff participates in something he shouldn't by asking Jon whether he wants to say whether he "spent any time" with Nicole. Ew. She looks utterly horrified and baffled. She does laugh, which some people interpreted as an admission that it was true, but I didn't read it that way at all, and in fact, when Jon was on Howard Stern post-show, he first claimed that he did sleep with Nicole, and then later admitted that he didn't. So Nicole may have been eliminated first, but she's not a complete loser. She also says, "You little shit," which they totally didn't bleep at all, much to my semi-surprise, considering I'd think they'd give themselves at least a few seconds of delay in case of such an event. "True or not?" Jeff asks Nicole. "No," she says flatly, adding, "Come on." You know, ambushing people about dating or other things that they might secretly be happy about is one thing; ambushing them about ill-advised hookups on someone else's say-so seems a little skeevy to me, even for Survivor. Don't do that, Jeff.
Not heeding me at all, Jeff is on to another nookie rumor victim. He asks Burton whether he wants to say anything about his relationship with anyone up in the top row, hmmmm? Burton has nothing to say. "We're not allowed to do that," he says, referring to spending time together between end of taping and finale, I guess. Burton, asked again, persists in having nothing to say. Finally, Jeff lays it out -- Michelle? Michelle, anyone? Michelle insists that Burton is like a big brother to her. Write your own V.C. Andrews joke here, I guess. Wrapping it up, Jeff asks Darrah whether Jon is any more appealing now than he was the first time she turned him down. She laughs, looking disbelieving and horrified, with an unmistakable "oh, RIGHT" expression on her face. "No," she says, "he's not appealing at all." Jeff then asks Darrah how her modeling aspirations are going. Well, they're not, she explains, but she hopes that maybe soon, they will. Oh, and she's switching from being a mortician to dental hygiene. Great. Less death, more suffering.