Survivor

Episode Report Card
Sara M: D | 1 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
RUSSELL IS THE GREATEST PLAYER IN SURVIVOR HISTORY

Probst has to talk to Colby now and ask him why he sucked so bad this season. Colby says he knew it would be a different game for him physically in the first challenge when he got his ass kicked by Coach, who we can see doing a few warrior poses behind him, naturally. Coach is happy to do it again, and kind of humps Colby from behind in a way I'm sure Colby does not appreciate. Oh, and then we get to see that clip from the show just to make absolutely sure that Colby's humiliation is complete, followed by a montage of Colby suckage. He can't even bowl. Colby admits that he didn't have much fun this time, although he enjoyed watching the season afterwards. Probst asks what happened, and Colby says that there was some "adventure lost" this season for him, in that they weren't really allowed to go out into the water or explore the jungle around camp. In previous seasons, he says, they've been able to go out into the water and dive and have adventures. That was missing this time, and it wasn't fun. Plus, he sucked in challenges. I miss the days when they used to have boats and go out to sea and stuff like that, too. But these days, they basically film the show in people's backyards, so you can't explore the jungle too far back because you'll walk into someone's house and you can't swim out that far in the ocean or else you'll get run over by a cruise ship or whatever.

Probst turns to Amanda to ask her, as a veteran of this show and one of only four people to make it to Final Tribal Council twice (Li'l Russell, Parvati and Sandra are the other three), why she still doesn't seem to have the "killer instinct" necessary to win the game. "Does this haunt you in life as well?" he asks. Damn, that's mean. What the hell, Probst? He didn't ask Colby if his challenge suckage haunted him in life, or Li'l Russell if his complete inability to get along with other people at even the most basic level haunted him in life. Amanda's like, "wow." Probst says he's not picking on her, because this is "what everyone on the streets says." Who are these people on the streets Probst is always using to gauge the entire audience's reaction to the show, and why does Probst trust them so implicitly? Amanda says she doesn't know why "it doesn't happen" for her, but she guesses she just feels too bad and guilty when it comes to voting people out and screwing them over, and that the game is "too emotional" for her. "Still, today," Probst says. "Yeah... not as much," Amanda says.

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Survivor

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