Ruling The Roost

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: B+ | Grade It Now!
So Much For Muscled Entitlement

Becky interviews in night vision that it's not particularly pleasant knowing that she received three votes, but that she feels pretty good with her alliance of Yul, Candice, and Jonathan. She does not mention the add-on members, Flicka and Cao Boi. They're just padding. They're just nonconformist, tattooed, not-like-other-people padding. Stuff 'em in a locker! Throw 'em in the trash! Fill their shorts with pepper! Yul offers Ozzy a hermit crab as a peace offering, but Ozzy turns it down. "I don't like hermit crab," he says, dead-eyed and resentful. I think Ozzy needs some new things to feel bitter about, because the fact that what he was trying to do to others got done to him instead just isn't doing it for me. Ozzy tells us that he feels like an outsider in his tribe. Wonder if Billy felt anything like that, ass. He also claims that Cecilia was the one who helped him "lay the foundation for all the things these people are going to enjoy." I see. They shouldn't have booted Cecilia because of the high-quality fire pit. Good one. "If they want to vote me out, they should do it soon so I don't have to keep catching food for them," Ozzy grumps in a voice-over. From your lips to God's ears, Fuzzy Bare.

And now, credits. I'm so disoriented. My world has been turned upside-down. Night is day. Black is white. Who are you?

On Day 9, we see a boat skimming across the water, and of course, it is carrying Candice back from Exile Island, where, based on her stance in the front of the boat, she apparently took the time she otherwise would have devoted to searching for the immunity idol and spent it instead on intense study of posing for magazine covers. When she returns to camp, she says, "No idol." Yul looks guilty. Does he ever not? Asked why she thinks she was sent to Exile, Candice says she thinks it's because she was the youngest. In other words, she's advocating the "they didn't want you to be able to improve the tribe by booting me" theory, rather than the "they wanted me there after the merge to help them kick your asses" theory. JessiFlicka says that she thinks it must have been Parvati and Adam, but that she "can't figure out why they would do it." She speculates that maybe they were trying to "protect" Candice. Candice looks around uncomfortably, and then laughs it off by saying that these are all good questions she hasn't thought about. In an interview, Candice says, yes, she suspects that this was Adam and Parvati's doing, but that she doesn't want the rest of her team to think she has some bond with her former tribe, so she played it off. Not particularly successfully, I might add. Indeed, when Sundra mentions that they might have been preserving Candice, Candice goes wide-eyed and says, "Oh, I didn't even think about that." What's great about this is that the show is kind of playing it to be crafty, like Flicka is trying to expose something and Candice is trying to conceal it, but I actually think they're both fairly guileless. I get the sense that if you put thought bubbles over their heads while they were having this conversations, the bubbles wouldn't have anything but ditto marks, referring to what was actually coming after their mouths. Or there would just be a lot of repeating. ("I never thought of that." "[I never thought of that.]")

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